My Best Friend is Gay

by Victor Thomas

Chapter 11

Football practice helped get my mind off my unsatisfied sexual needs. I lost myself in physical activity. I rammed into linemen and raced down the field using everything I had. I wondered how much of football was powered by sex. Young guys played and we were always horny. Maybe there was something sexual about the way we liked to knock each other down and pounce on each other. It was kind of gay when one thought about it. I'd have to share that thought with Spencer, but with no one else.

Sexual needs gave me extra power and aggression. In middle school, I intentionally didn't give myself any relief a couple of days before each game so I'd be extra fierce on the field. It worked, but it was also torture. Girls could never understand what it was like for a guy. I knew girls got horny, but it wasn't the same. There is no way they could be as horny as a guy. Then again…

I was looking forward to our upcoming game. Practice was fine, but playing an actual game was the best. It was a lot like a battle, except no one was killed. Well, guys did die playing football, but it was rare. I'd never seen it happen and it wasn't all that likely.

I calmed myself as I stripped after practice. I had a semi and I did not want to get any harder. How could Spencer stand it in the locker room and showers? How did he keep from getting hard all the time? The guys around me didn't turn me on, and yet the locker room was filled with testosterone. It had to be hell for gay boys, but also heaven. I would give about anything to undress and shower with the girls.

Don't think about that. Think about death, puss oozing out of wounds, tooth aches and dead fish swarming with maggots.

That was close. I made my way to the showers. I was still turned on, but maintained control. I snuck a look at Spencer as he showered near me. He wasn't hard. At most he had a bit of a semi. How did he do it showering near guys like the Duley brothers? I wondered if I turned him on, but perhaps it was best not to know.

I concentrated on shampooing my hair and soaping up my body, but even that began to turn me on. I wished I could control my level of sexual arousal. Being turned on was an enjoyable experience in the right time and place, but it was hell at the wrong time and place. The showers were definitely the wrong place.

I rinsed off, then walked into the dressing room and grabbed the towel I'd picked up from the towel boy.

"I am so glad to be clean again," Elijah said as he dried off near me.

I wondered momentarily if he'd be interested in Spencer.

"You don't like sweat and dirt?" I asked.

"I'm fine with it when we're on the field, but the moment I'm done it just feels nasty," he said.

I laughed.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Sweat does seem to stink more after practice."

Elijah departed. Spencer was just coming out of the shower. I noticed him check out Elijah's ass. I nodded to him and gave him a thumbs up while no one was looking.

"Shut up," he said.

"I didn't say a word."

"You say plenty without speaking," he said.

I gave him my best smart-ass grin.

"Want to go to Joplin with me?" I asked as we left the locker room. "I have to find a copy of that book."

"Definitely."

"I'll have to run it past my parents, but I can truthfully say it's a book for school," I said. "I can pick you up at your place in a few."

"Can we go to the mall?" he asked.

"Of course, we're going to the mall," I said. "I'm not driving an hour one way just to buy a book."

I had more problem than expected getting mom to okay my trip. It was almost an hour to Joplin so it would be dark before I got back. I thought about reminding her that cars had headlights, but there are times it isn't wise to be a smart ass. I was able to talk her into it, but it was close.

A few minutes later, Spencer hopped into the passenger seat and we headed east.

"While I was waiting on you, I checked online and found a used bookstore for you," he said.

"I was going to go to Books A Million ," I said.

"If this is supposed to be your favorite Mary Renault book, you will have read it more than once," he said. "Right? Your copy needs to look used. Besides, it will be cheaper."

"I didn't think of that," I admitted.

"Of course not," he said, grinning. "You're a dumb jock."

"Aren't you a dumb jock, too?" I asked.

"Nope," he said. "Check out the hair color, chocolate brown. You're a dumb blond."

"Well, I am blond, at least somewhat. I'm darker blond, almost brown."

"Yeah, whatever. You're blond enough and all blonds are dumb," he said. "I didn't make up the rules. That's just the way it is."

"Why do I like you again?" I asked.

"There's my charm, wit, good looks, amazing personality…"

"Stop! Stop!" I said. "You'll go on forever."

"That's right," he said.

"During practice, it occurred to me that football is a little gay," I said.

"What?" he asked.

"Well, we're always jumping on each other and grabbing each other," I said. "We also pat each other on the ass."

"That's why I play," he joked.

"We shower together, we eat together, and we're all pretty tight," I continued. "A lot of the guys are close enough they seem like they could be more than friends."

"Maybe they are," he said. "Maybe we're all gay, except for you."

"Quit dreaming, Spencer," I said.

"Oh, I don't want them all to be gay," he said. "I just want them all to let me blow them."

"You wanna be the team slut, huh?" I asked.

"Eh, it's a fantasy," he admitted. "It probably wouldn't be that cool in real life."

"Yeah, like my fantasy of an orgy with the cheerleaders," I said. "Don't get me wrong, if I got the chance, I'd be all over them, but a guy can only do it for so long before he has to recharge."

"What?" he exclaimed. "I thought you were the Energizer Bunny of sex."

We both laughed.

"I'm good for a long time, but it would take a superhero to do a cheerleading squad one after another," I said. "Now, if I could do one or two a day."

"Keep your mind on the road, Philip," he said. "I don't want to die this young."

"Yeah. True. Hey, I was thinking about you in the showers," I said.

"Oh? You were, huh?" he said. "Are you about to come out to me?"

"That sounded better in my head," I said. "What I mean is, I was mad horny during practice and had to calm my dick down so it wouldn't get hard in the locker room or showers, and that got me to wondering how you maintain control. If I was showering with the girls, I would have a raging hardon."

"Gay guys are superior," he said. "We have more control."

"Yeah, right."

"Hey, it's true," he said. "I don't make up the rules."

"I think you're making them up as you go," I said.

"Nope, blonds are dumb and gay boys are superior," he said.

"Listen, jerk…"

He laughed.

"Truthfully, I maintain control by not letting my eyes linger," he said. "I also think unpleasant thoughts, the more upsetting, the better."

"Hey, that's what I do," I said.

"Getting hot for Shawn and Cody, huh?"

"No!" I said. "That's not what I meant."

He laughed again.

"I'm hot for them," he said. "I would do anything either of them wanted."

"You're such a homo."

"You're such a slut."

"I do my best," I said. "I have slowed down recently, but I need some soon."

"You're going to nail a girl while you're pursuing Rebecca?" he asked. "What if she finds out?"

"I already nailed Ms. Shields while pursuing Rebecca," I said. "I'll be sure to pick one who won't tell her. I feel a tad guilty for thinking about other girls, but I have no idea if I'm going to get anywhere with Rebecca, and I have needs."

"True," he said. "It's not like you're dating, but at least you have talked to her now. That's a step in the right direction."

"Yep," I said. "You have your eye on any boys?"

"As a boyfriend or only a hookup?" he asked.

"Both."

"Are you sure you want to talk about this?" he asked.

"Yes."

He smiled.

"I'm obviously hot for Cody and the Duley brothers," he said. "I'm also into Lucas, but he has a girlfriend. Shawn Duley is dating Paul Simpson."

"He is?" I asked. "I didn't know Paul was gay."

"Do you live under a rock?" he asked.

"Sorry, I don't keep track of the CHS gay boys," I said. "Perhaps there should be a guidebook."

"Well, he is, and he's Shawn's boyfriend."

"That leaves Tim," I said. "I don't think Cody is gay."

"I wish, but I don't think so," he agreed. "Tim had a thing going with Dorian last year."

"Now he was definitely gay," I said.

"Yes, and out, so you get no points for knowing that," he said.

"Jesus! This gay stuff is complicated," I said.

"Welcome to my world," he said.

"What about Elijah?" I asked. "You were checking out his ass."

"He is hot," he said, "and he has a nice ass."

"Maybe you should get some of that," I said.

"I never thought we'd be talking like this," he said.

"Hey, you're my best friend," I said. "You have listened to me go on about girls forever. It's only fair. Can I ask you a personal question?"

"You can ask me anything, Philip," he said.

"Is Troy the only boy you've hooked up with?"

"I messed around with another boy at football camp last year," he said. "There was another a couple of years ago while we were on vacation in Florida. I have a regular thing going with a guy now, but I can't tell you who he is."

"Oh, mysterious," I said. "Is he our age, older, younger?"

"He's our age."

"Now, I'm very curious," I said. "Are you sure you can't tell me?"

"Yeah," he said. "He does not want anyone to know about him. I trust you, but it's his secret."

"I understand," I said. "I'm glad you're getting some."

"I am, but not nearly as much as you," he said.

"Well, we can't all be me," I said, grinning. He punched me in the arm. "Oww! You hit hard for a gay boy. I thought you were all sissies. Oww! Stop it."

"Why don't you go say that to the Duley brothers?' he asked.

"I don't have a death wish," I said.

"I'm glad they're out," he said. "It makes me feel better about myself."

"There is nothing wrong with you, Spencer," I said. "You like dick. So what? I'll admit, I had to do some thinking to come around, but I realized you're the same guy I've known for years. You're funny, witty, kind of a jerk at times, and fun to be with. You've always been there for me. What's not to like?"

"Hmm, will you repeat that when I can record it?" he asked.

"Hell no, except for the jerk part," I said. "I'll be happy to let you record me saying you're a jerk."

"Gee, thanks."

"I'll admit, I didn't think too highly of homos, but the more I understood, the more I realize it's no big deal. So, what if some guys like dick? Taking it up the ass sounds strange and painful to me, but then some of the stuff I do with girls is pretty strange when I think about it."

"I've always thought so," he said, grinning.

"Sex is pretty bizarre when you think about it," I said. "Why do we want to do it so bad or at all? If it weren't for the instinct and for hormones, I don't think any of us would even think about something like that."

"True."

"Hey, I'm curious about something," I said. "When you blow a guy… what's in it for you? I can understand what the guy who is getting sucked gets out of it, but what about the one doing the sucking?"

"What's in it for you when you eat a girl's pussy?" he asked.

"I love making girls squirm and moan," I said. "It's also a control thing. It's like I'm controlling them, but also like I'm serving them. I don't know if that makes sense, but that's what is hot about it."

"It makes perfect sense, and it's the same with two guys," he said. "It can be a dom/sub thing."

"It can make girls willing to go all the way," I said.

"I don't know if I can say something like that about guys," he said. "You know how it is. Once you pop, the need is less intense."

"It's all crazy, isn't it?" I said. "I mean, seriously, it's weird."

"Says the guy totally obsessed with it," he said.

"I didn't say I wasn't obsessed with sex, but it is weird," I said. "Even sticking your tongue in someone else's mouth is pretty strange."

"You can give up sex if you think it's too bizarre," he said.

"Hell no!" I said. "Sex is my drug and I am hopelessly addicted."

He laughed.

"I'm glad we can talk about stuff like this," he said. "That's one thing I needed. Troy isn't into talking much. He's just a horny little bastard. The other guy I can't tell you much about is so deep in the closet he makes me look like a gay pride parade."

I laughed.

"Sorry," I said. "He must have some major problems accepting himself."

"Yeah, but it's more fear of everyone knowing about him than anything," he said. "He won't even talk about it."

"Does Troy hook up as often as I've heard?" I asked.

"I think so, but he's secretive about it," he said. "He told me he gets guys because they know he'll get on his knees or bend over for them and never tell anyone."

"He does provide a valuable service, but that's… I don't know," I said. "He lets guys use him."

"As desperate as I often am for sex, I couldn't be like that," he said. "I don't think I could respect myself and yet I don't think about anything about Troy doing it. I don't think he truly gets used. I mean… he wants it. He gets off on it."

"I've hooked up with girls who are like that," I said. "Once they get going, they want to be treated like a cheap whore, so I guess I understand. The vast majority of girls are not like that at all, but there are a few."

"I bet you love them."

"Are you kidding?" I said. "Hell, yeah, I do! A girl who will let me use her and gets off on being used? That's freaking perfect, man. I can give into my dark side and not have to feel the least bit guilty about it. I treat girls with respect, but when one wants to be used, I'm all over her."

"You respect girls more than a lot of guys," he said. "Some aren't above force."

"Yeah, that's just wrong," I said. "I'll admit, I have rape fantasies, but a real man does not force. I do my best to seduce girls into doing what I want, but if they say no, that's it."

"I'd never force a guy, although I do have rape fantasies too," he said.

"Everyone probably does," I said. "Listen, about Troy… you should be careful about hooking up with him. He could be carrying diseases."

"Yeah, I thought about that," he said. "I don't hook up with him a lot, only sometimes, and we always use condoms. It's hard not to hook up with him when I know he's always available."

"Yeah, I'm sure he's as hard to resist as a slutty girl," I said.

"He's really good, too," he said. "I can slide right in when I top him. Sorry, that's probably too much information."

"No, it's cool," I told him, "especially after the details I've given you in the past. I'm sure plenty of that wasn't pleasant for you to hear, but I never once thought you might be gay."

"It's all good.

"I don't get how gay dudes can take it up the ass," I said. "If someone stuck their dick up my butt I'd scream like a girl."

He laughed.

"It hurts at first, unless you do it a lot like Troy," he said, "but then, it's amazing. It's… I can't even explain it. I would say you have to try it, but I can't picture that."

"Oh, hell no!" I exclaimed. "When I think of that, I think of pain."

"I guess that means I'm tougher than you," he joked. "I can take it and you're too afraid to even try."

"If I was gay, I'd try," I said.

"Some straight guys let girls use a dildo on them," he said.

"I've heard about that," I admitted, "but it's not something I want to experience."

"What if she was a hot girl and it's the only way you can have her?" he asked.

"That's a dilemma from hell," I said. "That's like asking if I'd let a girl kick me in the nuts if that was the price for hooking up with her."

"So, would you?"

"I don't believe so," I said.

"You're missing out," he said.

"Quit trying to talk me into taking it up the butt," I said. "It's not going to happen."

"Damn," he said. "I thought I could make you my little bitch."

"If I was into guys, you'd be my little bitch," I said.

"Nope," he said. "You're a sub. I can tell. I bet the girls you get with order you around."

"Hell, no!"

"Come on. You can tell me," he said. "Cody's mom made you wear a collar and leash, didn't she?"

"Uh, no, but that's strangely arousing," I said.

"See, I knew it," he said. "You are a sub."

"I am not!"

He laughed again.

"I love messing with you," he said.

We talked all the way to Joplin. We talked about subjects we had never talked about before, like gay sex, and yet it felt the same. I can't say that nothing had changed between us, but we remained best friends.

"Okay, where is this bookstore?" I asked.

He gave me directions, and in a few minutes, we pulled up to a large used bookstore on North Main Street. I parked and we went inside.

We split up. I found a historical fiction section arranged alphabetically by author. Unfortunately, it wasn't completely alphabetical so I began scanning the R section. The first novel by Mary Renault I spotted was 'The Praise Singer. ' I pulled it out. I had come for ' The Last of the Wine' but if I was a Mary Renault fan it made sense I'd have more than one of her books. I also found ' The Persian Boy' but the book I needed eluded me until I was nearly out of shelves. At last, there it was, and it was even well worn. Perfect!

"Find it?" Spencer asked when he walked up carrying three books.

"Yeah," I said. "What do you have?"

He blushed, but showed me. One was a book called 'Swimmer Boy' with a sexy and well-built guy on the cover, another was 'Dumb Jock' , the last was 'The Front Runner' which had two guys on the cover, one wearing only a towel.

"No one knows me here, but… maybe I won't buy them," he said.

He chewed his lip.

"I will," I said.

I took the books, put them with mine, and walked up to the counter. The lady behind the counter didn't react to his books. I paid and we were out the door.

"I can't believe you did that," he said.

"It's not like they are gay porn magazines," I said. "Hmm, there's an idea for a Christmas gift."

He eyed me, trying to figure out if I was kidding or not.

"Thank you. You're braver than I am. I would have turned completely red if I went to the counter with them. I thought I could do it, but no," he said. "I'll pay you for them."

"No," I said. "They were a present. Thanks to you, I found my book, much cheaper than it would be new, and nicely worn."

"Thanks," he said, smiling.

"You know, there is some gay stuff in the book I'm reading to impress Rebecca. Alexander the Great apparently liked guys."

"Well, yeah," he said. "He was gay, or bi anyway."

"Maybe that's why she was so surprised I'm reading it," I said. "You don't think she thinks I'm gay now, do you?"

"With your reputation?" he said. "I doubt it."

"It does seem unlikely," I said.

"So, does the book get into Alexander and Patroclus?" he asked.

"Yeah."

"I may have to read that," he said.

"I'll loan it to you," I said. "So, the mall next?"

"Let's go."

I drove to Northpark Mall on Rangeline Road. I noticed Spencer checking out a few boys as we walked through the mall. He was sly about it, but I had never seen him checking out boys back home. I guess he figured no one knew him here so it was safer. He also didn't have to hide what he was doing from me. I wish I had found out about him long ago. He shouldn't have to hide that part of himself from me. It wasn't fair.

I checked out girls and wasn't too sly about it, which earned me a scowl from a boy with one of them, especially when she smiled at me.

"It's a wonder you don't get your ass kicked," Spencer said.

"You noticed that glare, huh?" I asked.

"Yes."

"I would kick his ass," I said.

"I think you can take most guys, but there is always someone tougher," he said.

"True, and I don't go looking for fights," I said. "I've only been in two my entire life."

"I've been in none," he said. "I save my aggression for sex and the football field."

"Into the rough stuff, huh?" I asked.

"Yes."

"I wish more girls were into that," I said. "There are the ones I told you about, but they are few and far between."

"Oh! Abercrombie and Fitch !" he said.

He headed straight for the store and I followed along behind. Inside were fashionable but overpriced clothes and also huge posters of sexy young guys. Now that I thought about it, he always dashed into Abercrombie and Fitch when we visited Northpark Mall .

He headed for the back of the store. I noticed the other customers as I followed. Most were very young and very good-looking guys. Was this perhaps a gay store? I also wondered why I hadn't questioned Spencer's interest in this place. It was a gay boys dream, or at least, I supposed so.

There were a few posters of hot girls, so I guess that blew my gay store theory. I would have liked one of those hot babes on my bedroom wall. I had hooked up with hot girls… but damn!

"This is the clearance section. I can't afford the full priced stuff," he said.

He picked out cargo shorts, a couple of t-shirts, and two polos. I had to admit they all looked nice, but were too preppy for me.

We left the store several minutes later with Spencer toting a large bag with a shirtless boy on both sides.

"I'm beginning to wonder why I never suspected you're gay," I said quietly.

"Well, you are blond," he laughed. "Remember what I told you about blonds."

"Grr."

We visited Old Navy , another clothing store, a few minutes later and finally ended up in American Eagle , where he convinced me to buy a black polo that was on sale. For some reason it didn't seem preppy in black. He briefly considered a pink one, but I shook my head.

"You can wear pink after you come out," I said.

"Good idea, with shoes to match," he said, grinning.

"Please tell me you're kidding," I said.

"You never know, will you."

I was seeing another side of my best friend. He was… I don't want to say gayer because I'm not sure what that even means, but he was more animated, outgoing, and funny. I was glad he felt comfortable showing me that side of himself, but also sad that he'd felt the need to hide it from me in the past. He must have had to do a lot of hiding and it wasn't right.

We remained in the mall a good hour and would have stayed longer, but our time was limited, and we were starving. He was loaded down with bags when we headed for the parking lot. I carried only one from ' Aeropostale. '

"Hmm, you bought a black shirt and a gray shirt. Do you have something against colors?" he asked as we neared the car.

"Hey, I'm wearing blue right now," I reminded him.

"Yeah, but you need fashion assistance," he said.

"It's a good thing I have you then, isn't it," I said. "I'm warning you right now, I refuse to wear preppy clothes. I am a jock!"

"Straight boys are hopeless," he said, then laughed.

"Hey, the babes are hot for my bod," I said. "They don't care about the gift wrap. They only care about what is inside."

"If you wrapped up the package better, you might get more girls," he said.

"You think I should wrap up my package?" I joked.

"You know what I mean!"

I grinned.

We climbed into the car.

"Where do you want to eat?" I asked.

"Let's do Steak 'n Shake, " he suggested.

"You got it."

It was a short drive to Steak 'n Shake , and less then ten minutes later we were inside browsing menus.

"I'm glad you're obsessed with Rebecca, otherwise we wouldn't be in Joplin today," he said.

"I just hope I can impress her," I said. "I have to read the book I bought before this weekend."

"I can help you with the big words," he grinned.

"Shut up!"

When our waiter arrived, I noticed Spencer checked him out. He was certainly bolder when we were away from Chouteau. He ordered a triple steak burger, fries and a coke. I ordered a Frisco melt, fries and a coke.

"How many girls do you think you've banged?" he asked.

"Fifteen," I told him. "I keep a list."

What do you think your parents would do if they find out?" he asked.

"Mom would go nuts," I said. "Dad might act like he disapproves in front of mom, but he would be thinking, way to go, son!"

He laughed, but then his laughter quickly died.

"I wish I knew what my parents would think of me if they knew about me," he said.

"If they are good parents, they will be fine with it," I said. "If they aren't, then fuck them."

"That's easy for you to say," he said.

"Yeah, I know," I said. "Just remember, no matter what, you've got me."

"You don't know how much I appreciate that, Philip, or how much that sets me at ease," he told me.

"I'm not the nicest guy around, but I'm not a total jerk, either," I said.

"You've never truly been a jerk to me," he said. "You've insulted me at least a thousand times, but I know you don't mean any of it, just as I don't mean any of the shit talk I toss at you. Well, I did mean it when I told you that Hawaiian shirt you used to wear was butt ugly, but otherwise, no."

"That was a great shirt!"

"No, it was not," he said. "You can't argue. I'm gay, so that makes me a fashion expert."

We both laughed.

"There is something wrong with your argument, but I can't figure it out," I said.

"Of course not," he said. "You're blond."

"Girls love blond hair," I pointed out.

"So do guys," he said.

"I guess that means blonds are superior," I said.

"No, you just look pretty," he said.

"Grr."

Our food soon arrived and we stuffed our faces. Spencer checked out a couple of boys sitting near, while I eyed a booth of girls. I lost myself in a fantasy of having a four way with them and wondered if I could handle three girls. Sometimes, I was gasping and covered with sweat before I made a girl shriek and call out my name. Three would be physically challenging, but I was willing to try.

"Are you in there, Philip?"

"Huh. Yeah," I answered.

"You were thinking about sex, weren't you?" he asked.

"Yes," I admitted, "but I bet you were too."

"I think everyone our age thinks about sex all the time," he said.

"Instead of study hall, I think we should have sex period and hook up," I said. "Everyone could study so much better. Maybe I'll talk to the principal and propose that."

"Yeah, you do that, Philip," he said.

"Then again, we're seniors," I said. "By the time it was implemented, we will have graduated, so why bother."

"Yeah, if we don't get to have sex at school, why should anyone else?" he said.

"Well…"

"Seriously?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Who? Where? When?"

"Shana Blair, in the music room after school about a year ago," I answered.

"No way!"

I nodded.

"What did you do?" he asked.

"She gave me a blow," I said.

"Why can't I live your life?" he wondered.

"Remember, Shana is a girl," I reminded him.

"True that," he said. "How did it happen?"

"I could tell she was into me," I said. "I teased her and made sure she got a look at my abs. I ran into her after school. Our eyes locked and I motioned into the music room with my head. She followed. We made out, and then she groped me. A few moments later, she dropped to her knees. She was all over it."

"If someone else told me this, I would be sure they were lying," he said.

"If it isn't true, may my dick fall off," I said.

"The ultimate swear," he said.

"Yeah, and I've never lied to you about girls, Spencer," I said. "I might have exaggerated a bit, but never lied. I promise from now on not to even exaggerate."

"Same here, but with guys," he said.

"Are you going to continue with girls?" I asked.

"I don't think so," he said. "I'm not at all into it, and I kind of feel like I'm not being honest with them. I've never promised a girl anything I couldn't deliver, but I'm not what they think I am."

I nodded.

"Things must be tough for you," I said.

He shrugged.

"Yeah, but everyone has problems, and I honestly like being gay," he said. I wouldn't want to be, well, like you."

"Ouch," I said, pretending to be hurt.

He grinned.

"I know, inside, that this is what I'm meant to be," he said. It's so amazing with another guy. The male body is beautiful! You have a beautiful body, Philip. You could be a statue in a museum."

"You realize this is going straight to my head," I said.

He laughed.

"No, it's not, but I want you to realize what you've got," he said. "I don't think you realize it because you focus on females."

"Well, I know I'm built, but beautiful," I said.

"You are," he said. "I see a guy like you as a work of art."

"I like that!" I said. "I'm a work of art!"

"Please understand, I'm not coming onto you," he said. "I don't mean it like that. I am attracted to you, but we're best friends and I don't want to change that."

"So, no blow job on the way home, huh?" I asked.

"Like you'd want one from me, but no," he said. "I can get sex elsewhere. That's not what I want from you."

"Yeah, I don't want to change things between us either," I said. "You're my only true friend."

"Sex changes things," he said. "I can't mention her name because I promised I wouldn't, but I was friends with a girl until we messed around. We didn't go all the way, but it changed things. We weren't friends after that."

"Girls are often different after I have sex with them," I said.

"With Troy, it doesn't matter," he said. "All there has ever been between us is sex, but I intend to be careful when there is an existing relationship. You should think about that too. I know you're into Rebecca. If she turns out to be more than your dream girl of the semester, don't let your dick think for you."

"Hmm, a gay boy giving me relationship advice about a girl," I said, smiling. "Thank you. I have a feeling that may be valuable advice."

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