The Seventeenth Summer (1995)
by Mark Peters
Chapter 20
Despite the impending upheaval in his life and the many new experiences he was enjoying, Danny was asleep almost before his head had hit the pillow, with thoughts of exciting and erotic adventures soon filling his mind.
At some time during the night he woke to find his bedroom flooded with light coming in through his window, accompanied by the familiar rumble of Brad's prime mover. For a few moments he watched as shadows danced across the walls of his bedroom and he listened for any other sign of activity, before finally the diesel engine was shut down. That was quickly followed by the lights being cut, then came the slamming of the truck's door and the scrunch of boots on the gravel driveway. He knew what would come next . . . his stepfather would come through the back door, probably get himself a beer from the refrigerator, stomp down the hall, take a shower, and then crawl into bed beside his wife.
Now that Danny knew what he knew about the man, just the thought of him touching his mother was enough to make him shiver, let alone imagining them actually having sex.
For what seemed like a long time he waited for the telltale sounds of Brad going through the motions, then when he eventually heard the sound of the water being turned on in the shower and the bathroom door being closed, Danny slipped out of bed and crept down the hallway. He didn't want to hear the sounds of what he knew would surely follow, so he grabbed a drink from the refrigerator himself, then and quietly headed outside into the night, where he sat on the edge of the verandah leaning with his back against a post as he gazed up at the stars.
The night was a warm but not unpleasant one . There was very little traffic in town and the sound of the nearby surf could be heard, while the smell of the sea breeze filled his nostrils and an orchestra of insects serenaded him. He wondered what it might be like living on the farm in the commune that Jake had told him about, and guessed that it would be quite a bit different to what he was used to. There was much that he was going to miss about this place, with Nate being foremost in his mind, but what lay ahead of him was an adventure that couldn't be missed, and he was growing more and more excited about it. He knew it wouldn't be long now.
Closing his eyes and leaning his head back against the verandah post he thought of the rolling green hills that Jake had described to him and the crystal clear creek that ran through the property. He thought of them making love on the grassy banks of the creek, of digging a garden and growing their own food, and of building their own place in which to live, perhaps even their own work studio.
How many other guys his age would ever get to live such a dream, he wondered?
Danny was woken from his reverie by the sound of a door being closed somewhere inside the house. The ritual had begun.
And try as he might, he found it almost impossible to push from his mind what he knew must be happening right now in the room next to his bedroom. The only thing that eventually helped him do that was the almost endless supply of suicidal mosquitoes that seemed to have found him. So, for the next twenty minutes or so, he waged war with them, swatting them on his skin whenever he felt them settle upon him.
When he eventually decided that he had spent enough time outside listening to the insects and the surf, he ventured back inside and down the hall to his bedroom. All was quiet in the house and by the time he slipped beneath the sheets on his bed he could hear the sound of soft snores coming from his parents' room.
He wondered what would be going through his mother's mind right about now. Would she be lying awake, staring into the darkness and wondering why she let her husband do what he did, or would she be already sleeping, satisfied that her husband was home and with having provided him the loving he deserved.
It wasn't exactly a question he would ever be able to ask her, but still, it was one he was intrigued by, now that he was entering into a relationship of his own. And it was with that thought on his mind he eventually drifted off to sleep.
Morning came Danny woke to the sound of loud snoring, which continued to come from the room next door. He lay there straining his ears, listening for any other sounds in the old house. When he eventually thought he was the only person awake, he climbed out of bed and padded out into the hall, heading first for the bathroom, and then for the kitchen.
'Good morning, dreamboat,' his mother said, startling him as he entered the room.
'Errr, morning, mum,' he managed to reply. 'I didn't think anyone was up.'
She was sitting at the kitchen table holding a mug of coffee with both hands.
'Well, you're certainly up early for a Saturday.'
'Stuff to do,' he replied. 'Me and Nate were thinking of going fishing this afternoon and camping out tonight.'
'Your father will probably want to take us out to dinner, or go and have a barbeque or something while he's home.'
'Count me out. But you and the brats can go,' Danny replied.
'Danny!' she scolded.
'Well, aren't I old enough yet to make up my own mind?'
'He'll be disappointed . . .'
'I don't really care,' he replied, as he quickly crossed the room to where the electric kettle stood on the bench and pressed the button to turn it back on.
'I wish you would tell me what he . . .'
'I can't, mum. I just can't.'
'Dan, don't you think I know what he's like . . .'
'Mum, please, can we not have this conversation? There are things . . . well, I just don't think he's the person you think he is . . .'
'And don't you think I deserve to know what makes you think that?'
'I don't think you would understand . . .'
'You could always try me.'
Danny simply shook his head just as the kettle switched itself off, allowing him to turn his attention back towards making a cup of coffee.
His mother watched him from behind as he worked on what he was doing, noting his broad shoulders and nicely tanned torso, no doubt from all the summer activities that Danny and Nate and their friends had been getting up to. Her son's body was no longer that of a boy. Danny was becoming a man, and it was little wonder that someone had taken his fancy, and vice versa. With a guilty smile on her face she remembered that summer when she and Danny's stepfather had met. Danny was already a toddler, the result of an ill-fated relationship she'd had when she was sixteen, but meeting Brad had really been a summer of discovery, as had been every year since.
'So, did I hear you go outside last night, after your father got home?' his mother eventually asked.
'Yeah, I did.'
'How come?'
'So I . . . so I didn't have to listen . . .' Danny said quickly.
'Oh,' his mother replied.
For what seemed like quite a long time they studied each other over the rims of their coffee mugs.
'Why do you let him . . . you know . . .'
'What do you mean?' his mother asked him, while continuing to study him.
Danny just rolled his eyes.
'Oh, right . . . I keep forgetting, you're not a little kid anymore,' she said, while offering him a wry smile.
They both took a sip from their coffee mugs.
'Well? Are you going to answer me?'
'We can't help who we love, Danny . . . even if they sometimes do things that we would ordinarily be turned away by. You may not understand that right now . . . but I suspect that it won't be long before you do.'
'And how do you know when you do love someone?'
'Oh, honey . . . you'll know it. You'll feel it, right in here,' his mother replied, while placing a hand over her heart and drumming her fingers upon her own chest for a few moments. 'Is that what you're feeling?' she prompted.
'I . . . I don't quite know what I'm feeling . . . I guess, maybe . . .' he stammered, while feeling himself blush.
'I see. And are we going to meet this person who has so captured our son's heart?'
There she goes again, Danny thought. She said 'this person', and not 'her'.
What does she know?
'Maybe one day,' Danny eventually replied.
'Well, I hope we meet him before you get swept off your feet and the two of you run away together, or something,' his mother responded, leaving Danny staring at her, his mouth agape.
He had totally missed the reference to 'him' , of course. All he heard was the part about running away together.
'Wh-w-what do you mean?' he stammered. 'Why would you say that? Why would I be running away?'
'It's something that all young lovers talk about at some stage . . . running away together . . . usually to avoid mum and dad's disapproval. It wasn't quite the same when I met your fa… Brad . . . but we did talk about it. We had you to consider though.'
Once more Danny was floored as he stood there staring at her, his mouth still open ; at least until she told him to close his mouth, or he might swallow a fly.
His mother never ceased to amaze him.
His mother, of course, had her suspicions as to just who Danny's suitor might be. At first she had thought there was a girl involved, but after having been told by one of her friends on more than one occasion that her son had been seen climbing into the panel van of that city boy who had been hanging around town these past few months, well now she was thinking otherwise. No matter what though, she was determined that she wasn't going to say anything to him about it. Sure, it had stung at the time, at least for a short while as she came to the conclusion that while there might not be any grandchildren coming from her first born son, but she quickly realised that it really wasn't any of her business who her son might fall in love with. All she really wanted was for him to be happy in life, and if that meant that the person he settled down with was a man, then so be it.
Her only wish now was to somehow be able to let him know that it was okay if that's what he wanted out of life, while at the same time trying not to let slip that she already thought she knew his secret.
When Danny left the house there had still been no sign of Brad having surfaced, which wasn't that unusual following his late arrival last night. It was, however, something for which Danny was extremely grateful, as the less that he saw of the man these days the happier he was.
Each time he thought of what might have been on that night in the shed, a cold shiver ran through him. Just what the fuck was happening with people these days? If it wasn't Jake's parents all but kicking him out, it was his own stepfather hitting on him!
And then there was his mother! The one person who he thought was finally beginning to understand him, yet continued to confound him by making statements that turned his world upside down over and over again.
As he rode the short distance towards the caravan park, he replayed again and again in his mind the conversation he'd had with her earlier that morning.
At first he thought he had been mistaken, but the more he thought about it the more convinced he became about what she had said. Did she actually say that? Did she actually say she hoped to meet him before Danny got swept off his feet and the two of them ran away together?
Really? That was beyond scary.
He remembered standing there, just staring at her. He remembered the bit about her telling him, for the second time that day, that he should close his mouth before he swallowed a fly. He also remembered his hands shaking as he tried not to spill any of the coffee in the near full mug he was holding, although as the conversation had continued he had managed to calm himself down enough so that his shock didn't show; or so he thought. But when his mother had quickly gotten to her feet and gone to him, taking the mug from his hands and placing it on the kitchen bench, he knew that his shock and discomfort must have been obvious.
'It's okay,' she whispered, as she had wrapped him up in her arms and pulled him to her.
Danny's reaction wasn't quite what she had expected, but it had given her so many answers. For a long time she had held him, with neither of them saying a word.
'I love you . . . no matter what,' she eventually whispered, before kissing him on the side of his head, then stepping back from him and holding him at arm's length.
With eyes that were brimming with tears, Danny looked up at his mother.
'How . . . how did you . . .' he managed to say, before words failed him.
'That doesn't matter,' she had answered. 'We can talk about that later. All that matters, for now, is that you are happy. The rest is just detail. And don't worry about your stepfather. When the time comes, I'll handle him.'
And that was where it had ended.
Danny still wasn't sure exactly what his mother knew or how she had come to figure it out, but he did know that he needed to talk to Jake – and soon – and so that was where he was now headed.
When he rode through the gates of the caravan park he was relieved to see Jake's vehicle parked alongside the cabin. He skidded to a stop on the loose gravel along the edge of the road and dropped his bike on the grass, before knocking on the door. After a few moments Jake opened the door, once more wearing only a towel.
'Hey, babe. You're early!'
'We've got to talk,' Danny said, as he quickly stepped past his boyfriend.
'This sounds serious,' Jake replied.
'Mum knows!' Danny blurted out as he paced back and forth. 'I don't know how much she knows, or how she found out . . . but she knows I have a boyfriend! And I think she knows we want to run away!'
'First off, honey, you need to calm down!' Jake said to him. 'It's not going to do anyone any good getting yourself all worked up.'
'I can't . . . I can't fucking help it . . .'
Seeing that Danny was clearly too agitated to see reason, Jake stepped in front of him and grabbed him by both arms. 'Danny, listen to me,' Jake said, quite forcefully.
Finally Danny stopped and looked at him.
'Thank you. Now tell me, why do you think that she knows?'
'Because she made some comment about my hickeys, then she said to me . . . "I hope we meet him before you get swept off your feet and the two of you run away together, or something" . . . that's why! And that is word for fucking word!'
'Oh, Jesus!' Jake replied, as the blood seemed to drain from his face.
Somewhere outside a car was driving through the caravan park, but they took no notice of that.
Now it was Danny's turn to grab hold of Jake. Together they managed to make it to the couch that was just inside the front door and then sit down.
'What are we going to do?' Danny asked. 'I think we should go right now . . . right this fucking instant . . . just pack up and start driving . . .'
'But if your mum knows who I am . . .'
'Oh, shit . . . they could put out an A.P.B. on you or something . . .'
'They won't do that, Danny . . .' a voice suddenly said from the open doorway, startling both boys. Turning towards where the voice came from they found Danny's mother standing there. Jake dropped his head into his hands and sobbed. He felt certain he would be going to jail now.
'Did you . . . did you follow me here?' Danny exclaimed as he jumped to his feet and faced his mother, while trying to shield Jake. He was trembling with both anger and fear. How the fuck could his own mother do that to him?
'You can both relax, boys. Neither of you have anything to worry about from me,' she said. 'Now, are you going to invite me in? I think we all need to have a little chat.'
Neither of the boys knew quite what to expect as Danny's mother turned a chair from the kitchen table around and set it in front of them, then proceeded to sit down and face them. All Danny could do was close his eyes while praying that this was just a dream, but when he opened them again and he saw his mother smiling at him, he knew it was real. It was very real.
'First off,' she said, 'I'm sorry I had to follow you, Dan, but I didn't have a choice. I had to know that you were going to be okay.'
'W-what do you mean?' Danny replied. 'Why wouldn't I be okay?'
'How about we actually start at the beginning? I think you need to introduce me to your friend, don't you?'
'You know who he is, mum . . .'
'Yes, but I haven't actually met him now have I?' she replied, before leaning forward with an outstretched hand and offering it to Jake. 'I'm Danny's mother, Jude. And you must be Jake, if I'm not mistaken?'
'Hi . . . errr . . . yes, it's nice to meet you,' Jake replied, while nervously shaking her hand.
For a first meeting it was all quite formal, Jake thought. So what was to follow he wondered?
'I'm sorry that we are meeting like this, Jake. I'm sure that you boys had other plans . . .'
The boys nervously glanced at each other, before Jake reached across and took Danny's hand. If their plans had been figured out, there was no use hiding anything now.
It wasn't an easy thing for a mother to witness, but as she looked down at their intertwined hands, and the expression in their faces, Jude could finally sense something of what these two boys felt for each other. She remembered what it was like to be young and in love, and this was no different to what she had felt when she had been the same age as Danny was now. The only difference was that her relationship with Danny's father wasn't one that would have ever been considered abhorrent, or dirty. Their relationship had been accepted by society, even if the boy in question at the time had cleared out just as soon as he had found that his girlfriend was pregnant. Her son's relationship, however, would more than likely always be considered second class at best, or an abomination at worst, and for that she was truly saddened.
Pushing her own disappointment aside, she knew that she needed to let her son know that she still loved him no matter what. She also needed to let him know of her own plans, which until today had only just been a seed in her own mind, but would now need to be accelerated.
'Jake, I hope you don't mind my being blunt, but can I ask you something?'
'Of course, Mrs Anderson.'
'Do you love my son?'
Jake looked at Danny and smiled. 'Like no one else on this earth,' he replied, before turning back and facing her, while doing his best not to wither under her direct gaze.
'And do the two of you intend running away together?'
They could see her frowning, but when she glanced at her son and smiled, they both knew that things were going to be alright.
'Yes,' Danny replied. 'Jake found somewhere where we could go. Somewhere where we can just be ourselves, around other people like us, and where we could work on our painting and live as we please.'
For most mothers, hearing something like that coming from the mouth of their seventeen-year-old son, well, they would go ballistic, and probably start calling them all sorts of names, but not this one. Jude Anderson had lived through the sixties and come out of those years as an open minded woman who loved seeing nothing more than people living life as they pleased, and not downtrodden by the restrictions of modern society.
After studying them for what seemed like quite a while she smiled and said, 'Alright then, now that I have seen the two of you together, I can see what you boys mean to each other. I'm not going to stand in your way, in fact, you have my blessing. All I want is for my baby boy to be happy.'
'Mum,' Danny complained.
'When I said earlier that I had to know that you were going to be okay, it was because . . . well . . . let's just say that it was because you and Jake haven't been the only ones making plans for your future.'
'What?' Danny exclaimed. 'What do you mean by that?'
'The conversation we had this morning . . . and knowing what I know now . . . it all has only served to help me make up my mind about something that I've been contemplating for some time now. And now that I know you have someone who loves you, it helps make things easier for me. It's not easy to say this, but I'm going to leave Brad, Danny. I'm going to take Peter and Jodi and go to my sister's place in Brisbane, at least for the time being . . .'
'What has he done?' Danny demanded. 'Has he hurt you?'
'No, honey, he hasn't . . . but he did try to hurt you, didn't he?'
Danny felt Jake squeeze his hand, letting him know that he was there for him. He looked at Jake and saw nothing but love. He looked at his mother and saw the same.
'Yes,' he finally admitted.
'I thought so,' his mother replied. 'Your father has certain . . . what's the word . . .'
'I think the word is perversions,' Jake offered.
'Yes, Jake . . . I think you're right. Over the years I have been able to tolerate some things, because sometimes a partner needs to submit to their other half's will, and let's face it, a bit of variety can be fun as I'm sure the two of you will discover soon enough. But even I can only take so much, and lately things seem to have changed. Your father's interest in things relating to other men, which I've always been aware of, seems to have become more important to him . . . which is why I suspected what it was what may have happened between the two of you.'
Never in his wildest dreams had Danny ever thought he would be having a conversation like this with his mother, especially not while his hand was being held by the most beautiful young man he had ever met. It all seemed so unreal, yet it was also the most natural thing he could imagine.
'He tried to touch me, but I pushed him away. Nothing actually happened . . .' Danny said to her.
'Well, that's a relief,' his mother responded. 'But still, I can't take the chance that it won't happen to Peter, or even Jodi for that matter, so that's why I need to get away from him . . . and away from here . . .'
'How soon were you going to go?' Danny asked.
'I'm not sure. It will take me a little while to organize things . . . a couple of weeks maybe.'
'You'll need help, then?'
'No, it's okay . . . but thank you. What about you two? When were you . . .'
'Tomorrow,' Jake answered. 'But we can put it off if you . . .'
'No. You need to stick to your plans. You've got your own lives to get started on.'
'Well, we'll only be a few hours away from here . . . not too far inland from Ballina, so we can come back and help you if you need us to. I might even be able to help find a place for you to store your belongings if that's what you need. Just promise you'll let us know when you are ready to go. I'll leave you the details for how you can get in contact with us,' Jake insisted.
'Thank you, Jake. I can see now why Danny loves you so much.'
They both looked at Danny and could see him blushing. Jake hugged him, while his mother grinned at him. For Danny this certainly was becoming more and more unbelievable with each passing moment.
'So, you never did tell me how you figured out what was happening,' Danny asked his mother.
'Well, it was a combination of a couple of things actually. First the appearance of that first bruise on your neck told me that you were up to something, with somebody, then I was told by some of the local busybodies that you had been seen getting into Jake's car . . . so I guess that's when the penny dropped,' she replied.
'Bloody old gossips!' Danny spat.
'That's just the way things are in small towns, honey.'
'So, what do we all do now?' Jake asked.
'My suggestion is that you and Danny get going as soon as you can . . . today if possible,' Jude replied. 'My husband and I will be taking the kids for a barbeque at lunch time, and Dan has already said to me that he had other plans for this afternoon, which gives him an excuse to not come with us . . . I'll fix it with his father so that Dan can stay at home when we all leave the house. That's when you'll need to pack up whatever you need to take with you, Danny, and just . . . just go.'
'But Mum, I can't leave you just like . . .'
'You have to, Dan. Brad will be back on the road again tomorrow night, so he won't suspect anything if you stick to what you told me this morning, about camping out with Nate . . .'
'I'll have to go and see Nate,' Danny added.
'Does he know what's going on?'
'Yeah, and he's been great about it.'
'That's good. Go and see him now, and then come home, okay?' she said, as she stood up to go.
Danny nodded and the boys got to their feet as well.
For a moment Jude looked Jake up and down and smiled. All he still had on was the towel that was wrapped around him, which he was holding together rather tightly at his side.
'He sure is a cutie, Dan,' she said. Now it was Jake's turn to blush. 'Now, Jake, I still don't know very much about you, but I want you to promise me you'll look after my baby here.'
'I promise I will. He means the world to me, Mrs Anderson,' Jake replied.
'You better, or you'll have me to answer to!' Jude sternly replied.
'Oh, I will. Last thing I want is for you and Nate coming after me!'
'Nate?'
'Yes, he said exactly the same thing!'
'I'm going to go now. I would suggest that you don't collect Dan from the house, Jake, as someone will be sure to notice. You boys need to arrange a time and place to meet this afternoon, and Dan, see if Nate will help you take whatever it is you need with you. And take the money from the tea caddy in the pantry, okay? You'll need some. Anything else you want can wait until you come back in a few weeks' time. I'll make sure that it's while your father is away on one of his trips again.'
'I will, mum.'
After kissing each of them on the cheek, Jude promptly left them. They listened as she opened and closed the car door, and then started up her car. It wasn't until after she had driven away that anything else was said.
Jake kicked the cabin door closed with his foot, before turning to Danny.
'Can you believe that just happened?' he asked.
'It did happen, didn't it? It wasn't just another dream?'
'No, it happened alright. So I guess this is it, then? We're actually going to do this!' Jake said as he put his arms around his partner and hugged him close, allowing their foreheads to touch as they gazed into each other's eyes.
'I guess so.'
'Are you nervous?'
'Can't you feel me shaking?' Danny managed to chuckle.
'Did you have any idea about what your mum was planning?'
'None whatsoever. It came as a total shock to me.'
'But you're not really that surprised?'
'No, not now that I've been able to think about it. Every time my father comes home from one of his trips, the first thing that happens is they go into the bedroom and . . . well, you know . . .'
'Parents do have sex too, don't you know!'
'Yeah, but I could always hear them and it was . . . I dunno, pretty weird. And dads aren't supposed to try it on with their kids though, are they? The old man has gone a bit weird, I reckon.'
'Yeah, maybe . . . but I guess it can happen.'
'I just can't wait until you take me away from here, Jake.'
'So, how do you want to do this?'
'How about we all meet at Hidden Beach later this afternoon?'
'It's a date. But before you go, there's something we need to do,' Jake said, as he let his towel drop to the floor and reached for the bottom of Danny's t-shirt.
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