Gran's House
by Kit
Chapter 15
We arrived at the foster home just as they were clearing away the lunch dishes. I immediately noticed that there were a couple of 'Happy Birthday' balloons in the living room and more in the kitchen. Although I was unsure of the family protocol on such matters, I decided to give Mike his gift and card immediately, before he left the kitchen and possibly disappeared for the afternoon.
"Congratulations on becoming a teenager," I said as I handed it to him.
His initial reaction was one of surprise, followed by a look of suspicion, and then a smile began to grow as he opened the present.
"I remembered you said you liked running," I said, "so I hope you like these."
Again the look of suspicion and doubt returned, but it was quickly replaced by another smile. Meanwhile, my brothers had handed the bags with the cake and plums to Sarah and David, who were looking on with mild surprise. They appeared to be reasonably happy, so if I'd breached their gift-giving protocol, they didn't appear to be upset about it.
"Can I try them on?" Mike asked.
"Good idea," I replied. "You need to see if they fit. If they don't, I'll try to exchange them."
For a moment he looked as if he thought I was crazy, then he left the room, leaving me wondering why he didn't just try them on in the kitchen. While waiting for him to return, I went to the car and retrieved the trifle from the cooler. When I returned, Sarah was taking the plums out of the basket and putting them onto the worktop.
"I picked them this morning," Liam said proudly.
"I helped," Connor added.
"It was a team effort," I said.
"Taste them. They're really good," the little boy said.
She took one, washed it, cut it in two to remove the stone, then popped half in her mouth. She smiled and said, "Yes, Liam, they are really good. I think they're the nicest plums I've ever had."
Susie, who'd been standing by her mother and watching her intently, raised her open hand and said, "Please. Thank you."
Sarah gave her the other half of the plum, and after carefully examining it, the toddler took a bite. Then she smiled and proceeded to eat the rest, apparently oblivious to the juice dribbling down her chin. Her mother quickly grabbed a paper towel and dabbed up the juice before it dripped on the little girl's clothes.
"Can I take some for Mum?" asked Katie, who'd been loading the dishwasher.
That took me by surprise because I'd assumed that she was in foster care because she had no parents.
"Yes, of course," Sarah replied.
She took a few fruits, washed and dried them, and put them into a brown paper bag. Meanwhile, Mike had arrived back, but there was no sign of the running shoes.
"Did they fit?" I asked him.
"Yeah, good," he replied with a hint of a smile.
"So what sort of running do you prefer?" I asked him.
"Just running," he replied, looking at me quizzically.
"That's good. If you were into track racing, you'd need a different type of shoe."
"Katie, we should leave in a couple of minutes," David said.
The girl replied that she was ready but wanted to use the toilet first, and then she left the room. Sarah informed me that David would be taking Katie to see her mum, something that everyone else, including my brothers, had obviously already known. As soon as she returned, she and David left the house.
Sarah offered me tea, which I accepted, and I sat down at the table. She asked if the boys wanted a plum, and all three accepted, so while waiting for the water to boil, she gave each of them a fruit and a paper towel. Mike sat down opposite me, then my brothers sat by my side, their body language giving me the feeling that they were laying claim to me.
"This is really good," Mike commented, sounding surprised.
"Glad you like it," I said, "because once the season really gets under way, I'll probably be bringing lots of them."
Apparently deep in thought, he finished eating the fruit, dabbed his mouth, then wrapped the stone in the paper towel. He looked me directly in the eyes, and unusually, he didn't immediately avert his gaze.
"Why did you bring me a present?" he asked in a tone that made the question almost into a challenge.
"It's your birthday," I replied with what, to me, was the obvious answer.
"But it's a nice present, and I don't really know you."
"You've seen me a few times, and you're the foster brother of my brothers, so we're almost related."
Although I was looking at Mike and couldn't see my brothers' faces, I could detect the sudden tension in their bodies and felt that perhaps they disapproved of my words. By contrast, Mike seemed less suspicious, and I thought there might have been a hint of happiness, though that may have been wishful thinking.
Sarah, who seemed a little concerned by my words, suggested that the boys wash their hands and entertain themselves for a few minutes while she and I drank our tea in peace. Before he left, Mike said that he wanted to go to the park and try out his new shoes.
"You should break them in before doing any proper running in them," I pointed out.
"Break them in?" he asked.
"New shoes can be stiff and not a perfect match for your feet," I replied. "You need to wear them gently for a while so that they can maybe stretch and loosen up a little and fit better. Just wear them for walking around for a few hours before going running in them; otherwise you'll end up with blisters and sore feet."
"Okay," he said, sounding a little disappointed, "I'll wear them for a walk this afternoon."
"I think you may be making an impression on Mike," she said after the boys left. "He finds it difficult to trust people."
Her words made me wonder if his lack of trust had been the reason he'd so quickly taken the shoes up to his room.
"It's a pity that Katie's not going to be here for his birthday afternoon," she continued, "but she doesn't often get the chance to see her mum, and she didn't want to miss the opportunity today. But they'll be back in a couple of hours, with plenty of time before tea."
"It occurs to me," I said after a brief pause for thought, "that maybe when Mike's comfortable with his shoes, I could teach him some pre-run stretching and warming-up exercises and some basic techniques before he does any serious running."
"That might be a good idea," she said, "but…"
"Oh. I'm sorry," I interrupted, "maybe you'd think I'm being too presumptuous?"
"No, it's not that," she said and smiled. "I was about to say that I'm not sure that Mike would want to do it, at least not until he gets to know you better."
"If it's okay with you, it won't do any harm to ask, will it? I promise not to feel rejected if he doesn't want to," I said.
She said it would be okay to ask him, and when I did so, he agreed, but he didn't seem very enthusiastic. However, he was rarely enthusiastic about anything, so I didn't take it personally. I suggested that he should tell Sarah when he felt the shoes were broken in and comfortable, and then we could arrange a time for a little training session.
I asked Sarah if she needed any help with party preparations, but she said that there were only a few small jobs left to do and suggested that I could take the boys to the park. As the weather was fine, I thought that was a great idea, and Liam and Connor were also eager to get some fresh air. Mike seemed happy to join us so that he could start breaking in his shoes.
Everyone enjoyed the birthday party, and even Mike seemed happy, though he seemed to cringe a little when we all sang 'Happy Birthday'. Afterwards, my brothers and I helped David clear up in the kitchen while Sarah took Susie to the bathroom, and Katie went with Mike to watch TV in the living room.
Once the party debris had been cleared away, David asked my brothers if they'd unpacked their bag and put their dirty clothes in the laundry basket. When they admitted that they hadn't, he told them to go and do it before they forgot. The first thing they did when they came back downstairs was to ask me when they could see me again, and arrangements were made for the following afternoon.
Mike, who'd been close enough to overhear us talking about my next visit, appeared to be about to say something but remained quiet. He quickly averted his gaze when he noticed that I was looking at him, and then he left the room. A little later, just before I left and while my brothers weren't nearby, he came up to me.
"Can we do run training tomorrow afternoon?" he asked very quietly, and from the expression on his face, it seemed that he expected me to react negatively.
"What about breaking in the shoes?"
"There's tonight and tomorrow morning," he replied, "and I can wear them all the time."
"Okay, then," I agreed, "but make sure your feet don't get sore."
He tried unsuccessfully to suppress a smile, then nodded and left the room.
The following afternoon, my brothers came out to meet me as soon as I drove up to the house. David was in his office but came into the hallway to greet me, and we all went into the kitchen, where I accepted the offer of tea. There was no sign of Katie, and when I enquired about her, Sarah said that she'd gone out with a friend. When Mike appeared, he didn't say anything, merely nodding an acknowledgement of my presence and looking at me expectantly.
"Mike didn't eat as much as usual for lunch today," David announced. "He said he didn't want to be too full to go for a run."
"That's good thinking," I said, giving the red-haired boy a look of approval, "but alternatively, we could've just waited a bit longer for lunch to settle."
"I can eat more at teatime ," the boy said.
I enquired about nearby countryside running areas, and Sarah suggested that Lytton Dell, about a ten-minute drive from the house, might be suitable. Liam was delighted at the prospect of walking in the fresh air, but Connor didn't seem so happy. He complained that he might like to try running if he had the right shoes. However, I pointed out that if it wasn't going to be a hobby, his trainers would be fine and that if he wanted to take it up seriously, I'd get him proper shoes.
When we were getting into the car, Mike went straight to the front passenger seat, and neither of my brothers said a word or made any move to discourage him. Perhaps that was because it was just the day after his birthday, or maybe it was because neither of them wanted to share the back seat with him. Possibly they couldn't be bothered to make a fuss because it was only a short journey.
Lytton Dell was a shallow, wooded valley with a small stream at the bottom. It formed a border between farmland and a relatively new housing estate, and perhaps that was the reason it had remained undeveloped. There were rough paths both along the stream and on the sides of the valley, and if it had been bigger, it might have been a suitable location for one of my usual runs.
Liam immediately went to explore by the side of the stream, and although it obviously wasn't deep, I stayed close to him and warned him to be careful. Then I explained to Mike why it was important to do stretching and warming-up exercises, and I showed him the sort of things he could do. Meanwhile, Connor stood close by and listened intently, and I wondered if he was actually interested in what I was saying or was just keeping his eye on me and Mike.
I pointed out to Mike the various paths that might provide a nice circuit for a run while keeping him in my line of sight. He went off along one of the paths I'd suggested, and then Liam shouted out to me. In one area, where the water was relatively slow-moving, he was delighted to have found tadpoles. While keeping an eye on Mike, I took a look at his discovery and pointed out that some had started to grow legs.
"Look! Little fishes!" Liam said, having moved about a metre upstream.
"They're minnows," I said, taking a quick look. "You may be able to find some sticklebacks if you keep looking."
He frowned in puzzlement, as if I'd been speaking a foreign language.
"Sticklebacks are little fish with spines on their backs," I explained. "But maybe there aren't many around here; otherwise they'd be eating the tadpoles."
"I'll chase them away!" he said, looking at me in horror.
"Don't do that. It's part of nature. The sticklebacks have to eat, and that's why frogs lay so many eggs. If some of them don't get eaten, then the place would be full of frogs. Then the frogs wouldn't have enough to eat, and they'd starve, which may be worse than getting eaten."
With an expression that indicated that he didn't approve of how nature worked, he went off to do a little more exploring and found a tiny frog hiding under a big leaf close to the water. Picking the frog up, he held it in the palm of his hand to show me. The tiny animal, apparently unperturbed, stayed where it was.
"This wasn't eaten," he said happily. "Can we take him home?"
"It's cruel to take things from their natural home," I pointed out. "Imagine some giant picked you up and took you away from your home to a strange place where you couldn't find food and where there was no one you knew."
He frowned, and then he put the frog back where he'd found it.
Meanwhile, Mike had continued around his chosen circuit and was making good progress. However, I made a mental note to speak to him later about conserving energy and other changes he might consider making to his technique. When he eventually returned to where Connor and I were sitting on a fallen tree, he was red-faced and breathing heavily.
"Did you enjoy that?" I asked as he sat down beside us.
"Yeah," he huffed, "it was great… These shoes… are really comfy."
His green T-shirt was soaked in sweat, and his black shorts were sticking to his wet thighs. Fortunately, I always kept a large towel in the car.
"D'ya want a race?" Connor asked the red-haired boy. "Same paths?"
Although it was possible that my brother may just have been trying to be nice, I strongly suspected that he wanted to take advantage of the fact that the other boy was tired and breathless.
"It's time to head back," I said, looking at my watch. "Mike will need to shower and change his clothes before tea."
As soon as we got back to the house, Mike went upstairs, and my brothers and I joined Sarah in the kitchen. I asked if we could do anything, and my brothers and I helped her with some final food preparations. Meanwhile, Liam enthusiastically described in great detail his encounter with the tadpoles, the minnows, and the frog. Katie returned while he was saying that he was glad that he didn't see any tadpoles being eaten.
While we were having our meal, Sarah asked Mike how he enjoyed his run, and he replied that he loved it and would like to go more often. He expressed himself with an enthusiasm that I'd never seen in him before, though if Liam had been speaking, the same tone might have been considered subdued.
"Running isn't just good for physical health and fitness," I said. "I really enjoy it and find that it's also good for my mind. I can concentrate on what my body is doing and on my surroundings and just let any worries fade away."
"Yeah," Mike agreed quietly, almost as if he was talking just to himself.
"Do you get to do any running at school?" I asked him.
"Nah. They have track racing, but I don't want to do that."
"Yes, I agree. When I was at school I just did cross-country. Maybe you could ask your school to set up a cross-country team."
"Maybe," he replied in a tone that told me it was very unlikely that he'd take up my suggestion.
At the end of the meal, Mike and Katie cleared the table and then went to the games room. David told my brothers that he'd like to speak to me in private, so they went to join the other children.
"It was a great idea to get Mike interested in running," David said once the boys had left the room. "I've never seen him so enthusiastic."
"He was already interested, so I can't take the credit," I replied. "I got him the shoes because he told me that it was something he liked to do."
"Oh," he said, mildly surprised. "He never mentioned it to me or Sarah."
We both considered that in silence for a few seconds, then I had an idea.
"Remember when we talked about the possibility of me adopting my brothers, and you quite rightly pointed out that being a brother is very different from being a parent?" I asked. He nodded, and I continued, "Well, I'm still giving that a lot of thought, but now it occurs to me that a reversal of that idea may be relevant for Mike."
"How do you mean?"
"You and Sarah are great parents and are role models for the sort of parent I'd want to be. But maybe Mike, deep down, would also like to have a big brother as well as great parents."
"Please be careful with him," David said with a look of great concern. "He's had a traumatic past, and although he's getting better, he's still fragile. He may pretend to be tough, but he's easily hurt."
"Of course I'll do anything to avoid hurting him, and hopefully you can be my guide," I replied soothingly, "but I wonder if it might be good for him to have someone treat him like an ordinary little brother without any baggage from his past. Anyway, let me know what you want me to do or not do."
"Okay, this may sound strange, but I want you to be very careful about doing anything that encourages him to think of you as a big brother. Sorry, but I can't explain why, at least not now, but maybe in future."
At that point, Connor and Liam returned, apparently impatient at being away from me and possibly wondering if David and I had been talking about them. They were disappointed when I told them that I'd be leaving in a few minutes, but they were cheered up when I pointed out that I'd be coming back to pick them up the following day.
When I arrived at the foster home after Sunday lunch, it was raining steadily, so Liam and Connor didn't come out to meet me. I accepted David's invitation to have a cup of tea, but my brothers didn't appear to be very happy with my decision, presumably because they were eager to leave. Then Sarah came in with Susie, quickly followed by Mike and Katie, so within a couple of minutes of my arrival, the whole family was gathered together.
"How are you feeling today?" I asked Mike. "Any sore muscles?"
"Just a bit," he admitted quietly.
"They'll soon get better. Actually, it helps if you can keep moving a little, so it's a pity it's too wet for a little stroll in the park. Maybe you could try a few of the gentle stretching exercises that I showed you, but don't push yourself too hard."
"You said that you go running in the rain," Connor said to me in a tone that made it almost an accusation.
"But not rain like this. Just light rain when it's a warm day," I replied. Turning back to the red-haired boy, I added, "And, Mike, when you were running yesterday, your body seemed a bit tense. If you can try to relax and loosen up, then you won't use up so much energy, and you won't be so sore the next day."
"How can I run and relax at the same time?" he asked, frowning.
"If you're not racing, then you're just doing it for fun, and you don't need to push yourself too hard. So just go smoothly at a comfortable pace. When you do that, with a bit of practice, it can feel almost as if you're gliding," I said, and with a chuckle, I added, "Unless you're going up a steep hill!"
"I didn't know you were a running coach," David commented in an amused tone.
"I'm not, but we had a good coach for our school cross-country running team."
Later, after I'd brought my brothers back to my house and they'd unpacked their bag, we went to have afternoon tea with my godparents. Aunt Anne had certainly gone to a lot of trouble to provide a large variety of sandwiches and cakes, and in return, the boys willingly submitted to her interrogations. In fact, they also interrogated her, mostly about their mother but also about me as a child.
Much of the time, Aunt Anne and the boys talked about me as if I wasn't there, which made me uncomfortable, and much of what they said was also embarrassing for me. In order to avoid listening to their conversation, I joined Uncle Geoffrey in the living room. When we got home, the three of us were all so full that we didn't have an evening meal, just a little snack before bed.
The following afternoon, the gardeners came round, which kept Liam entertained. While my brothers were occupied, I contacted Charles and asked him to provide me with an introduction to an adoption agency. In the evening, we were all in the living room, with my brothers playing a console game on the big TV screen. Meanwhile, I was searching the internet for suitable campsites, but that was interrupted when David phoned.
"Can you speak privately?" he asked.
"Just a second," I replied, getting up and heading toward the dining room, leaving my brothers engrossed in their game.
"It's about our discussion regarding Mike possibly thinking of you as a big brother," David said when I informed him that I was now alone. "Because it's confidential information, I couldn't really explain at the time, so you must have thought it was weird."
"I know you well enough to understand that you must have a good reason."
"Well, today Sarah and I had a conference call with Rose and Mike's counsellor. The consensus was that as he already seems to be getting close to you, these are special circumstances. Therefore, it would be allowed to share some limited background information with you so that you could behave appropriately. However, the information is confidential and very sensitive, and you must promise not to tell anyone, not even your brothers. And you mustn't let Mike know that you know."
"I promise," I replied sincerely.
"Okay, it's better to talk about such things in person, so maybe we can do that next time you're here."
"Okay," I agreed, respecting his experience and professional opinion.
Just as we were about to end the call, a thought occurred to me.
"One other thing," I said. "Mike told Liam and Connor that he'd never been to a beach. So I wondered if sometime, either before you go on holiday or after you come back, we could all have a family trip to the seaside. "
"Erm, maybe," he said hesitantly.
"If you're concerned about cost, I'd be happy to pay for everything, such as meals, petrol, fairground rides and anything else," I offered. "And I have beach umbrellas, windbreaks, blankets, and lots of things like that."
"Okay, I'll talk with Sarah, but I can't promise anything."
When I returned to the boys, they'd already paused the game and were waiting for me.
"Who were you talking to?" Connor enquired.
"David."
"What about?" he asked, narrowing his eyes in suspicion.
"I can't tell you," I replied. "But it wasn't about you or Liam."
"Okay," he said, trusting me to obey Rule Two.
The following week was quite hectic, but fortunately the weather was dry on most days so we could spend time outdoors. We went for walks in my favourite running locations, I took them shopping in the city, they practised riding their bikes, and Liam insisted on looking for newly ripe plums almost every day. Some of our indoor activities included me starting to teach Liam how to read sheet music and showing Connor basic computer security techniques.
On the Wednesday, when the lawn had dried out enough, I decided to put up the tents in the garden. They both enthusiastically agreed with my suggestion that we all spend that night sleeping in them. Liam was concerned about possible damage to the lawn, but I reassured him that it would be okay for just a couple of days. As we prepared for our night outdoors, I discovered that they had absolutely no idea how to utilise a limited tent space.
We all enjoyed our campout on the lawn, though with easy availability of food, drink, cooking facilities, toilets, and so on, it wasn't what I would have called real camping. Based on the voices and giggling from their tent, they didn't get to sleep until quite late. However, I didn't comment on it. After all, for them it was an exciting new experience, and we didn't have to get up early the next morning.
One of the things they'd asked me to do was to take them to the memorial garden, which I did the following day. The weather was overcast but dry, and the temperature was relatively cool for the end of July, so the boys wore jeans and sweatshirts. Feeling the need to show respect, I wore a semi-formal shirt and trousers, together with a wool jumper. When we arrived, there were only a couple of people and no gardeners to be seen.
Connor and I sat on a bench while Liam wandered slowly around, and there was very little conversation as we all seemed lost in our own thoughts. After a while, the younger boy came and sat down, wriggling his way between me and Connor. Then, much to my surprise, he began to cry gently.
He didn't look very distressed, and thinking it better to wait until he'd stopped before asking him about it, I just put my arm over his shoulders. Connor copied my actions, and after a couple of minutes I took a small pack of Kleenex from my pocket and handed one of the tissues to Liam. Soon after that, the quiet sobbing subsided.
"Why were you crying?" I asked worriedly. "Maybe we shouldn't come again if it upsets you."
"No! I want to come again," he protested. "I'm not upset, just a bit sad."
"Are you more sad now than the last time we came?" I asked.
Taking a few seconds to answer my question, he dabbed his eyes and blew his nose so loudly that Connor's look of concern was temporarily transformed into a smile.
"Not more sad," he replied slowly, "just a different sad."
As he probably didn't understand his own complex emotions, I didn't press him for clarification. Instead, I just gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze and gave him time to process his own feelings. Connor also remained silent and gently stroked his little brother's hair.
"I thought of something that made me feel bad," the little boy said eventually. "If Mum was still here, we wouldn't have met you. I feel bad because I'm glad we met you."
He had an expression that I couldn't interpret as he looked me in the eye and then quickly looked away.
"But… but I want Mum back, even if we'd never meet you," he continued.
"I understand," I said gently. "Sometimes a good thing will happen after a bad thing. We don't need to feel guilty about being happy about the good thing because we still feel sad about the bad thing. And of course you'd rather have your mum than an extra brother, but we have to make the best of what we do have."
That wasn't the most coherent thing I'd ever said, but my brothers seemed to know what I was trying to say.
"Anyway," I continued, "maybe you would have met me anyway. Maybe I would've come looking for Mum, or maybe she would have eventually told you about me. We can never know what might have happened if she were still with us."
"So we can still come here again another time?" the little boy asked.
"Of course we can," I reassured him.
Before taking my brothers back to the foster home at the end of the week, I did the laundry and made sure that all the clothes they'd worn were clean. Although they'd told me that Sarah wouldn't mind them taking their dirty laundry back with them, that wouldn't have felt right to me. After all, they'd been with me for almost a week, not just a weekend.
When we arrived at the foster home, the boys went upstairs to unpack, and David invited me into the office. Unusually, he ensured that the door was closed before we sat down.
"About Mike," he said. "First, I just want to emphasise again that this is absolutely confidential, and I wouldn't be mentioning it at all if it weren't for the fact that you mentioned being a sort of big brother figure for him."
"Of course," I replied, "I' ll keep anything you tell me absolutely secret."
"Okay," he said, nodding his head and pausing before continuing. "For years, he was emotionally abused by his mother and physically abused by her boyfriend. Eventually, when he was nine years old, the physical abuse came to the attention of Social Services. The ensuing investigation revealed extensive abuse that he'd suffered for more than three years."
"Oh my god!" I exclaimed involuntarily.
Of course, I'd known about such horrifying stories reported in the news, but knowing the child involved made it even more shocking for me.
"The fact that his own mother not only didn't protect him but also emotionally abused him destroyed his ability to trust anyone. Years of therapy have begun to help him recover a little, and the anger is now only smouldering. However, trust is still very difficult for him, and I think that the only person he really trusts at the moment is Katie." He paused to allow me to absorb that information, and then he added, "We also suspect that Mike was also sexually abused."
"Just suspect?" I asked.
"There were some ambiguous physical and behavioural signs, but Mike has never spoken about it."
"Not even to his counsellor?"
"His counsellor would never divulge anything he says to her. She can only report on his general mental state and whether or not it's improving. However, there are some indications of sexual activity. For example, Mike appears to have a transactional attitude to sex."
"How do you know that?" I asked, feeling puzzled and a little out of my depth.
"I can't give any details, but almost two years ago, Mike was in a larger foster home. There was an, erm, incident. The foster carers stepped in, but the damage was already done. However, there was little they could do when rumours began to spread at Mike's school. He became even more miserable and withdrawn, often refusing to leave his room or even eat. So it was decided that he should move to a new home in a different area with a different school."
"That's unfair!" I protested. "Mike shouldn't have been punished like that."
"The move wasn't a punishment but a chance for a new start, free of any negative reputation. As for being unfair, well, there are often no perfect solutions to such situations. The best we can do is to try and choose the least-worst option. Anyway, Mike was glad to have a new start, and he even asked if he could move as far away as possible."
"Okay," I said as I began to get a better understanding of the situation.
"At the time, his foster carers and Social Services suspected that the boyfriend's son might have shown kindness toward Mike in exchange for sexual favours. Anyway, as I mentioned, Mike has never said anything about being involved in any sexual activity, and on the rare occasions he mentions the older boy, it appears that he considered him to be like a big brother."
"And do you think that if I behave like a brother, he might be reminded of the boyfriend's son who may have abused him?" I asked, struggling to understand the consequences of Mike's terrible experiences.
"That's certainly a consideration."
We both sat in silence for a couple of minutes as David allowed me to absorb that information and its implications.
"But you know I'd never…" I began.
"Of course, we know that you wouldn't take advantage of him," David quickly interrupted me. "The problem lies in how Mike interprets things and how he might feel if he trusts you and then feels let down or rejected."
"But you said the last, erm, problem was about two years ago," I said. "Maybe Mike's learned from that experience, and it won't happen again."
"Maybe it won't. Hopefully it won't, but perhaps you can see that we need to be cautious."
"Does that mean you want me to avoid becoming closer to him?"
"No, I don't mean it like that. We just thought that you needed to know the background so that you can look out for any warning signs and, as I said, be cautious. It's not safe to assume that Mike will respond to a big brother figure in the same way as other children would."
Having heard about Mike's horrific experiences as a young boy, I desperately wanted to do something to help him. However, now that I was aware of the potential pitfalls, I had no idea what I could do. David waited patiently for me to process the information, and eventually, I thought of a possibility.
"If he really wants to take up running, maybe I could act as his coach," I suggested. "And as long as I behave like a mature adult, he shouldn't think of me as a brother. What do you think?"
"I suppose it's worth a try," he replied pensively, "and we can monitor how he reacts to the situation."
The discussion must have taken longer than David had expected because when he looked at his watch, he was surprised and stood up. I took the hint, stood up, and followed him out of the office. David called Mike's name and said that they needed to leave. The boy appeared from the kitchen, and both of them left the house.
After seeing them off, Sarah announced that she was going to take a tea break and invited me to join her. My brothers were still upstairs, and Katie was in the living room with Susie, enabling Sarah to speak with me privately in the kitchen.
"We hadn't known that Mike had never been to a beach," she said. "So, if it's still okay with you, we'd like to go along with your suggestion and accept your offer."
"Of course, it's still okay," I confirmed. "The family picnic was so much fun, and I'm really looking forward to a family trip to the beach."
"David's taken Mike to an appointment with his counsellor," she confided quietly after making sure that no one was near enough to overhear us. "Now that you know about him, I hope that you understand why we're so careful."
"Yes, I understand, although to be honest, I wonder if maybe I would've been happier if I didn't know his background."
"Telling you was a difficult decision, but on balance we decided that the risk to Mike could be too great if you didn't know," she said. Smiling apologetically, she added, "I'm sure you understand that we have to give Mike's wellbeing a higher priority than your possible unhappiness."
"That would be my priority, too," I replied.
"By the way, he loves those shoes, and if the weather's okay, he goes running in the park at least once a day. Sometimes I think he overdoes it, and once he came hobbling home with a bad cramp."
"If you like," I said, "I'll have a word with him and give him a little coaching. In fact, for a bit of a change from the park, maybe I could go running with him in Lytton Dell. I think Connor would like to try it, and I'm sure Liam would like to check up on the tadpoles."
"That would be nice," she replied, "but please be very careful. And I don't mean with the running."
"Yes, I know what you mean," I said, nodding my understanding.
"Another thing," she said. "You haven't mentioned Katie. She might feel left out if she's excluded from the trip."
"Erm," I replied, feeling uncomfortable. "Wouldn't it be inappropriate for a man to take a young girl in his car?"
"If you were taking her on her own, it would be, but she'll be with her three foster brothers, and you'll be going to a public place outdoors."
"Okay, then, if you're fine with it, then I'm happy to include Katie."
"Good, because I was a little concerned that if you are off running with Mike and Connor, then Liam would be on his own and maybe not always in sight. I know that Katie would rather explore with him than go for a run with the rest of you."
When Liam and Connor came downstairs, we discussed our plans. I told them that I could pick them up again after Sunday lunch and return with them on the day we went on the family trip to the beach.
"What trip to the beach?" Connor demanded. In an accusatory tone, he added, "You never said anything."
"Sarah and I only just discussed it, so until now there was nothing to tell you," I pointed out, "and we still haven't decided exactly when."
"A family trip?" Liam asked.
"It means we all go together as a family in the minibus," Sarah answered for both of us.
"That means Paul, too?" the little boy said, clearly wanting to make sure.
"Yes, like our picnic," she confirmed.
I was preparing to leave when David and Mike arrived back. When she told them about my suggestion of going for a run in Lytton Dell, Mike unsuccessfully tried to hide how pleased he was with the idea. Then Sarah suggested that instead of picking the boys up after Sunday lunch, I could take them and Mike to Lytton Dell in the morning, then have lunch with the family before taking my brothers home with me.
I pointed out that I and at least two of the boys would probably be sweaty and smelly at lunch, especially if it was a warm day. She and David offered to let me use their shower while the boys used their own. All of us having agreed to the arrangements, I said my goodbyes and went home.
When I picked up the children on Sunday morning, it was mostly cloudy with some sunny spells, but most important was the fact that it wasn't too hot. Mike sat in the front passenger seat, so I was immediately hit by the strong scent of the sunscreen that Sarah had rubbed into his exposed skin. Apparently, because of his very pale skin, she'd put much more on him than on the other children.
Liam and Katie went to look for tadpoles as soon as we arrived at Lytton Dell, and I showed Mike and Connor some warm-up and stretching moves. Then I pointed out the route that we'd be running and gave them a few tips on technique. Mike listened intently, but I got the impression that Connor was only pretending to pay attention.
I told them to set off, and then I followed behind them so that I could see how they were doing. That meant I wasn't running properly but just jogging relatively slowly. However, any sort of exercise outside in the fresh air was something that I enjoyed, so I didn't mind having to restrain my urge to go faster.
From the outset, it was clear that Connor intended to make this into a competitive race, and he rapidly moved out ahead of Mike. It was also clear that my brother was physically built more like a sprint runner and that he wasn't taking any notice of the tips that I'd given them. By contrast, the redhead appeared to be a natural distance runner and was trying to put my suggestions into practice.
Within a very short time, my brother was a long way in front, but he soon slowed down, and when Mike and I caught up with him, he was already breathing heavily. Judging from the expression on his face, Connor was beginning to feel pain from the build-up of lactic acid in his muscles. When I suggested he might want to rest awhile, he declared that he wanted to push on because Mike had started to take the lead.
At first I was tempted to insist that he take a brief break, but he didn't look too distressed, so I decided to allow him to carry on with what would be a learning experience. I just followed close behind him, watching closely in case he pushed himself too hard. Eventually, he began to adopt a more relaxed style and appeared to be more comfortable.
Meanwhile, Mike had gradually stretched out his lead, which he maintained until the end of the circuit, despite the fact that my brother tried to overtake him with a sprint finish. As they sat on a fallen tree, Mike was flushed and breathing heavily, but Connor was red-faced and almost gasping for breath. By contrast, I'd not exerted myself at all and still felt the need for a run.
"Connor," I said, "that wasn't bad for your first time. And Mike, it's obvious that you're continuing to improve."
"I'd… do… better… with… proper… shoes," Connor gasped.
"We'll get you some this week," I promised him, "but while you two rest, I'll run on my own, and maybe you want to watch."
Checking that both boys were recovering, I took off the small backpack I'd been carrying and gave each of them a water bottle, instructing them to make sure they properly rehydrated. Liam and Katie joined us with the bag of towels and started describing their explorations. As I felt the need for some real exercise, I decided to use a different, longer circuit that included several steeper paths.
"How come you're not out of breath?" Connor asked, almost as a complaint, when I returned.
"It was just a gentle run," I replied, "so my breathing and heart rate haven't increased much."
"I'll get better at it when I've had more practice," he said with conviction.
"Connor, I think you're more of a sprint runner than a distance runner," I pointed out gently. "You're big and strong with fast muscles, which would make you a good sprinter as well as a great footballer.
"Different people have different types of bodies. That means their build and their muscle type are better at different things. My body isn't good at sprinting but is good for long distances. We all make the best of what we have."
"My body is better for long distances, like Paul's," Mike said with a hint of pride.
"And mine doesn't like running at all!" Liam quipped happily.
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