Are You Scared Yet?
by J J Janicki
Chapter 23
Overall, I really liked Sister Mary Katherine. She made you think, but as you might imagine, there were times when this led to some arguments. Take the case of Galileo, for example. I'm not going into very much detail on this, but...
Take Forty-Seven. I'm not going into any detail, except for this: It might have been unwise of me to suggest that she might be having some doubts herself. I still thought she was having some, though. I was almost sure of it.
Take Forty-Eight. Well, maybe I should go into just a little detail, but I was honestly trying not to be too obvious when I suggested that she might be having some doubts, but then when she suggested that I was being a bit presumptuous, one thing led to another and so on and so on until I was wondering if we were about to revisit the Inquisition.
So that led to my having to turn in a written report on a Time Magazine cover story on the secrets of the adolescent brain. If you're interested, it can be found in the May 2, 2004 issue. Although...
Well, it wasn't long until I was also wondering why Sister Mary Katherine would ever want to give me an excuse to act my age... but that's probably beside the point.
Believe it or not, though, this is about to lead back to the Boy Scouts and us - mostly me and Stephan - occasionally wondering if things were about to get out of hand.
Being indecisive isn't always a bad thing... unless maybe you think that being impulsive is always a good thing... but the problem is that, almost by nature, adolescents are impulsive. It's because of our underdeveloped prefrontal cortexes, often referred to as the seat of rational second thought. Or possibly indecisiveness, but you see, once into adolescence, our prefrontal cortexes aren't growing: in fact, for awhile they're actually shrinking! So that's why we often leap into things based solely on what our dreaded amygdalas are telling us. The amygdala is the emotional center of our brain and it operates on our primal urges.
That could be a problem.
But at least we weren't worried about things working out as badly as they did in Lord of the Flies. That's the searing story about a group of English schoolboys stranded on an island without any adult supervision, who, in spite of that, didn't give into their sexual urges, and what that led to.
Elliott could probably argue the point I'm trying to make, though, so returning once again to another group of adolescents without any adult supervision on Saturday afternoon, August 1st, even though it occurred to me that it was a little late to be having second thoughts, it seemed as though Dan was still having some, even if the only worry he was giving voice to as we were making our way back was finding all the other Scouts still naked and not inclined to getting dressed again.
Only then Chase mentioned the possibility of them not wanting to get dressed until after they'd had another circle jerk. So that could have been a problem. Todd said it would be at least an hour before he could possibly get it back up again, and the rest of us figured it would be even longer, but if the others were anxious to give it another go, then what was our excuse going to be?
"We'll just say it's none of their business, " said Todd.
"I'll tell them that we'll wait until later on tonight, " said Dan firmly.
I was thinking ahead, though. "We've been gone for more than an hour. So if anyone asks what we've been up to..."
"We'll tell them that it is none of their stupid business, " repeated Todd. Only, he didn't sound quite as sure of himself, and as for me...
I was thinking, "Before this is over, we are going to have an orgy!"
First things first, though, and to our surprise, once we got back to camp we found all the other Scouts dressed again. Just in shorts, but still presentable enough, and no one mentioned having another circle jerk right away, because now we had something else to worry about. While we were gone, Elliott had tried moving his station wagon a little more off that goat path we were on and he couldn't get it into drive! Park, reverse and neutral worked, but it would not go into drive, so they ended up pushing it off the road.
So that was definitely a problem. I guessed that Stephan and I could cover a used transmission, (Carlie said it would probably cost no more than $500, and he was sure he could put it in), but how were we supposed to get it towed to Bakersfield if the tow truck couldn't even get to it?
Dalton thought he had a solution, though. Less than a mile from his house was a garage, and he knew the owner's sixteen-year-old son. Well, he didn't know Seth real well, but he seemed to be friendly enough, even though he was a little strange.
"He's not just a little strange, he's very." corrected Todd.
"He's let me ride with him on his Can-Am and he didn't act too strange then, " replied Dalton, "but what I'm getting at is: if he's not doing anything, I bet if you put your car in reverse, he could hook a cable to it and then he could pull you out that way."
A Can-Am is an ATV and some of them have lots of power. So if Seth could be convinced, and if his Can-Am had any power at all, we were hoping with him on one end and with Elliott giving the station wagon gas on the other...
Well, there was at least a possibility that it might work, so encouraged just a little, we didn't spend an undue amount of time worrying about it. Mostly because I was more worried about that other thing. Were we going to have an orgy or not? And if so, well, when?
I googled it once. "How many does it take to have an orgy?" Most answers said at least five, so if that's true, we might have had a few mini-orgies after Elliott entered the picture. There were still some boundaries, though, so it really wasn't an orgy. Orgies have no boundaries.
Then in Dan's case, he might have thought it was an orgy, but it was just him and us. He did us, then we did him so he wouldn't feel as much guilt as he might've felt otherwise. But if you're having an orgy, you're not concerned about guilt. Not that Stephan and I thought there was anything inherently wrong with an orgy: we'd read about some that sounded interesting as could be. All I'm saying is, we weren't sure if we wanted to be involved in one immediately. Because if all the other Scouts were involved...
They seemed nice enough, but we were sure that most of them weren't really gay. Admitting to bisexual tendencies is one thing. If no one in your group is having a problem with it, I think most boys that age would give into their urges without any second thoughts, but we were fairly sure that was as far as it would ever go. So we had no intention of outing ourselves to the entire troop, just as apparently Dan, Chase and Todd weren't intending to. In fact, Dan was still saying that he somehow wanted to put a lid on it. I had no idea how he was going to manage that, but there was certainly no point in me and Stephan complicating matters even more.
And besides, as far as we knew Carlie, Earl and Elliott hadn't outed themselves either, so that was another good reason.
And beyond that, Chase and Todd were spending the night in our tent, and based on what had just happened...
Stephan and I guessed we could deal with a foursome.
In fact, we were looking forward to it.
Only we had another circle jerk that night. For the record, I did Jonathan while Edwin was doing it to me and it didn't seem as though anyone was any less enthusiastic about it. It was still sex, after all, so even though there were at least eight of us who'd experienced more, all of us enjoyed it immensely. You could probably even qualify it as a legitimate orgy. Switching partners happens in orgies, right?
So okay, it was an orgy then.
But it was also counterproductive, because once finished, we were wiped out! Especially me, Stephan, Chase and Todd, so we just ended up talking and listening to music on Todd's boom box. It was nice, with me and Stephan cuddled up together in our zipped-together sleeping bags and them in theirs, but aside from that, nothing else happened that night....except for some more seeds being sown.
Dalton loved our cats. So that was one of the reasons we decided to learn more about him, because of Squeak and Alexander. They needed a good home.
Then another reason was his music. From what we heard on Todd's boom box Saturday night, I could see our musical horizons being expanded quite a bit.
Or I could go with the third reason, which was that we'd already decided it was perfectly permissible to drool and Dalton was cute to the point of being almost beautiful. And the twins weren't bad either. So when we started having some hints thrown our way... and they weren't all that subtle...
We decided to go for it. Just out of curiosity, you know.
Only, I'm getting ahead of myself again. So for the moment, I'll leave it at a little foreshadowing... or a great deal as in, "Just how many more are there?", but first, I'd like to discuss my second reason, the music on the memory stick Dalton let Todd and Chase borrow that night. It's important, all right? It's has something to do with life, the Universe and almost everything else, so...
Okay.
I'd still like to specialize in Bulgarian Studies, but I'd also like to be a DJ. And it's possible, even if I only want to play music that appeals to me. I don't care if it's hugely popular or not, if I don't like it, then I'm not going to play it. But of course I'll be constantly trying to impress my listeners, so I always want to be eclectic. I want to surprise my listeners and then I want to blow them away.
Although I'll probably wait until I'm sure I have at least a few regular listeners before opening the program with some classical. Not classic rock, classical. As in Mozart or Beethoven. Just briefly, like for example: maybe about a minute's worth of the start of the 5th Movement of Beethoven's Sixth Symphony, and then I'll fade that out and on with the show. But the thing is, most of my listeners will probably be thinking that I'm poking fun at Beethoven, only, I wouldn't be. I really do like "The Shepherd's Song". It is awesome!
It'll probably be awhile longer before I ever say that on the air, though.
But if you want to know a lot about anything, you have to be willing to admit that you don't know it all, right? I'm always open to being surprised and blown away, and that's what happened when Chase popped in Dalton's memory stick. One right after another, there was...
"Marilyn, My Bitterness" - The Crüxshadows. (It rocks!)
"To Believe In Something" - The Eden House.(Oh wow? Yes!)
"Body Electric" - The Sisters of Mercy. (Could cause a listener to lose control and wreck his car.)
"Light My Way" - NFD. (Propulsive head-banging.)
"Train of Hope" - Red Lorry Yellow Lorry. (Funky!)
"Cry Little Sister" - Gerard McMann. (From The Lost Boys soundtrack album.)
"Talking Back" - Red Lorry Yellow Lorry. (Very funky!)
So okay, I thought The Crüxshadows totally rocked, but I'd never heard of them before. And I'd also not heard of any the other groups... or Gerard McMann. So except for "Cry Little Sister", it was all new to us, and we were going to add them to our play list as soon as possible. Explaining why, though...
Well, it's sort of subjective, but obviously Dalton's musical tastes impressed us. Even after Chase remarked, "He likes to think that he's already a Goth boy, so I don't guess I should be surprised.... Truth is, though, I like this."
That's when I showed my ignorance, because, correctly assuming that he was referring to the music, I said, "That's not Goth. And what do you mean, he thinks he's Goth?"
See, I didn't know much about Goth music. I'd once checked out some on YouTube, only it happened to be Bauhaus, and for me that wasn't the best starting place. Even though most who're supposed to know say that Goth rock started with them. So that's why I did start with them, but because of that I decided that all Goth music was dark and gloomy. After all, YouTube is always pointing you towards groups it thinks are similar... even if they're not always right...
But I wasn't in the mood for dark and gloomy that night, so that ended it until I decided there was a reason to investigate further. I mean, Dalton didn't strike me as being even particularly introspective, and his music certainly didn't sound very gloomy, so for starters: "Okay, explain just what a Goth is, then."
So, after making a face, Chase said, "That's like me asking you to explain what a New Yorker is. Because... they're how many million? At least several million, but just like everywhere else, all these people are... um, different. They're individuals. So... that's what Goths are... But... I think we need to start some place else with this."
So number one: Dumb question on my part. But number two: beyond some stuff he'd looked up on the Net, he didn't have much to go on either.
Although he was fairly sure they were free-thinkers, and if that was the case, then we were certainly on their side.
They valued individuality over conformity. Chase was positive about that much, and I don't care for conformity either. Yeah, I know. Surprise, surprise. Well, I don't. Like conforming, but...
He'd also read that most were at least open to bisexuality, with quite a few being more than open, so of course we thought that was yet another point in their favor.
In fact, the more he talked about what he thought Goths were like, the more we began to think that we might be prime Goth material as well! They suddenly seemed to be way cool. So as far as me and Stephan were concerned, Dalton was looking ever more cool... and possibly mysterious...
We kept our thoughts to ourselves, though.
Or, at least, we kept our thoughts about Dalton to ourselves, but it wasn't long before Stephan let something else slip.
See, I was playing the devil's advocate, so just for the sake of argument, I brought up something once mentioned by Sister Mary Katherine. Socrates had once complained about about the way young people were acting back in his day, and that included the way they dressed and wore their hair. So her point was that teenagers have always tried to be different, but if you dress and talk the same way all your rebellious friends dress and talk, then you're not being different.
Only, the reason she brought Socrates up was because of some of us questioning our school's dress code. It's often a sore point with Catholic school boys, what with a rigidly enforced hair-length rule and our school blazers and our identical ties and grey slacks... so it still seemed to beg some questions...
But, for a change, I didn't bring any of those up, and it's probably just as well. There's no telling where that could have ended up. Just as I never would have thought my saying that once we were in Seattle, I was letting my hair grow down to my shoulders and I'd probably get my ears pierced and paint my nails black... I never would have thought that could lead to Stephan suddenly remarking, "We know someone who decided he'd go to school dressed up like a rabbit. Ears, tail and everything... You think that could qualify? As being Goth?"
"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back."
~Will Rogers~
We'd not mentioned our performance art before, and it still could have been left with us saying nothing more than we knew someone in New York who'd once tried to go to school dressed up like a bunny rabbit. Because that's the route Stephan intended to take. So he was also thinking about making up some more stuff, but unless Todd and Chase seemed to be breathlessly interested as in: "Oh God! They stripped him naked in the subway station? Then what happened?"...
Yeah, that could have been interesting all right, but not knowing what Stephan had in mind, I elbowed him in the side and the problem was, both Chase and Todd noticed me doing that. I mean, I didn't have time to think about elbowing him discreetly, so...
"Umpth! Why'd you do that for? It wasn't like I was going to mention us..."
And then he caught himself. Admittedly, if not for me elbowing him harder than I intended, he probably wouldn't have blurted that out, but he had, so he finished as best he could. "But it's not like it's a big deal, you know."
Then for Chase and Todd's benefit, he finally finished brightly with: "It's our version of performance art."
"Oh. I see, " said Chase. Only, now he seemed bemused. And Todd was just shaking his head in wonder, even if it was probably feigned. And I was getting tired of boys barely older than I was acting like they were bemused, as though they were so much more mature and worldly-wise than we were, but...
Chase giggled and said, "Last Halloween, I guess Dalton and the twins were doing some performance art themselves. They went for a ride on their bikes.... In the middle of the night.... In another neighborhood.... And they were wearing masks.... And that's all."
Then after a brief pause, he finished, "Or at least that's what they said, but you know, I don't think I'd ever have the nerve to do something like that. Just think if they'd been caught! Can you imagine?"
"Almost, " I allowed.
"Yeah, me too, " Todd agreed. Then: "So you never tried going naked with a mask?"
Stephan quickly answered. "Not a chance! I'm like Chase on that score, but we found two dozen choir robes at one of those resale places... the guy said the only way he'd let us have them was if we took them all off his hands, so it feels like you're naked, even if you're not.... Unless somebody decides to pull your robe up. Then it could be a problem I guess, but since they come almost down to our ankles, they'd have to try awfully hard."
"Right now, I can think of three who just might, " said Todd.
Then it was Chase with a not-so-discreet elbow. We pretended not to notice, though. Stephan and I, we knew nothing!
Like hell, we didn't.
Well, we weren't positive, but we'd just been discussing Dalton and the twins, so it seemedlogical enough. Improbable or not, as in how many more could there possibly be, it still did.
But like I said, guessing that we'd play it by ear if and when anything else came up... pun only partially intended... we kept our thoughts to ourselves that night. From that point on, it really wasn't difficult, because we had choir robes enough for everybody, and after Stephan mentioned how great it felt to be naked underneath them, Chase and Todd were determined to give it a try as soon as possible. Maybe even at the Valley Plaza Mall! Just imagine! I mean, everybody couldn't wear rabbit masks, but Chase had a Darth Vader mask and Todd had an Oregon Duck mask and Brett had a Dracula mask, and...
It wouldn't be like we were breaking any laws, right?
Um... well...
Sunday morning, though, the rest of the Scouts were only told a little about our performance art, but that was because of our tearing one of the robes into strips. We wanted to convert those strips into loin cloths. The Scouts were in their ceremonial loin cloths and about to play flag football, so of course...
Well, there's performance art and then there's playing flag football with our loin cloths being the flags, and that's why it wasn't much longer until we were all in loin cloths singular, because with two, there was twice as much chance of being tagged. And it also made more sense to wear our cloths in front, even if that often led to more than just our flags being grabbed. In fact, Bradley soon started wearing his in back, because he'd just started getting some hair, and he didn't want it pulled out.
For awhile, though, we were pretending to be serious about playing flag football. Dan and Elliott were calling plays and we were keeping score and exulting over touchdowns, but the charade couldn't last for long. In particular, Dalton had a wicked looking boner. We all had them - it didn't take long at all - and Elliott's was certainly much larger, but I loved the way Dalton's was whipping around.
So yes, even though we tried to be discreet, we - me and Stephan - were paying a lot of attention to Dalton and the twins, but they in turn were paying a lot more attention to us. It wasn't long until all sixteen of us were grabbing at anyone who happened to be within reach, so I don't think we were ever too obvious, but it hardly mattered if we were or not.
Especially not after Bradley, Edwin and Jonathan tied Brett to a tree. So there Brett was, facing them with his hands tied behind the tree looking both doubtful and hopeful. I have it on my camcorder, all right? So, sure enough, with as much solemnity as he could manage, Edwin cleared his throat and announced, "And we shall now initiate you into the Order of the Coyotes!"
Then that was followed with dawning recognition on everyone else's part. Even if the idea had already occurred to some... so I guess that would mostly eliminate the dawning part... and I was also going to throw in all the others reacting with mounting excitement...
Only that wouldn't be applicable either. Because we were almost as excited as we could possibly be already, but at least no one immediately became over -excited. Not until after Elliott mentioned the Bag Balm.
The way some look at it, it's okay if you lose it while you're being initiated - that's the entire point, after all - but it's not okay to be fondling yourself while you're watching. It doesn't matter how much the one being initiated is wiggling and squealing, you're not supposed to be playing with yourself while that's going on. Only, some were. Every once in awhile, I'd pan around with the camcorder... just briefly, and...
Well, maybe almost everyone was at some point. Sort of absent-mindedly, and to be fair, it could easily have been only because that person was looking forward to his turn. Who wouldn't be? If you're thinking about soon being tied to a tree and having wonderful things done to you, just that in itself might cause you to go off too soon. Especially if you've never experienced it before, and none of us had. I'd been tied up, only then they just left me there. And of course Elliott had been tied up... and if we'd tried playing another tie-up game with him back in Oxmar, he probably wouldn't have been very cooperative, but this was different!
Dan was the only one who over-did it, though, and he handled it well enough. He laughed shakily and managed, "Oh good. I guess I was looking forward to being initiated a little too much, because I just went off too soon."
"Oh Gawd!" exclaimed Bradley, "I wish you would stop..." then he let go. Of Brett. Who was still being initiated, you see. So...
Bradley looked down at himself and finished, "You're about to make me lose it, " but at almost the exact same time, Brett wailed, "Don't stop!"
Well, Brett needn't have been concerned, because David quickly took over, but if you think about it, all this brought up even more questions.
We were assuming that we had tons more experience than any of the Scouts, but no matter how experienced you are, being tied naked to a tree and knowing what's about to happen, is a novel experience. And tying all those assumed-to-be-innocent Scouts to a tree, one after another, was also quite an experience. Trying to recreate it all without becoming repetitive is a problem, though. It's certainly not a bad thing... this repetitiveness... not if you're the one in ecstasy, it's not, but squirming and gasping and whimpering and even some awoooing times sixteen? "Oh oh oh oh ooooohhhh shit!" times sixteen? I think not.
But yeah, I really think it was an orgy.
Sunday night it was just me and Stephan in our tent. Earlier, Chase and Todd said it was going to be them and no one else in their tent, so after shooing Dalton and the twins out of our tent, we finally had it all to ourselves.
At first, though, it went no further than cuddling. We'd just been involved in an orgy, after all, so until we could get ourselves recharged again, we simply talked about this and that, and there sure was a lot to talk about.
For example: as far as we could tell, not one of the Scouts seemed to be the least bit bothered once our jerk-a-thon was over. Sex without guilt. What a concept. Almost like bonobos!
Or possibly like English schoolboys in the not-too-distant-past. If any of those stories can be believed, then sex-play almost always went way beyond mutual wanking, so once we were in Seattle, we'd certainly be staying in touch with the Scouts. There was no telling how far things were going to progress, but one thing was for sure: the genie was now out of the bottle. So it could make an interesting spin-off story, all about them fighting the forces of sexual repression... and possibly gaining some new converts along the way...
And put that way, Dalton and the twins became even more interesting than before. First, we had to convince ourselves that we weren't rationalizing, but that wasn't particularly difficult, because we were almost dying from curiosity. We weren't sure if we'd already given ourselves away or not... before they invited themselves into our tent... but after I did give almost everything away, it hardly mattered.
Here's how it happened. Dalton asked if we minded them spending the night with us, and in reply, I said, "Well, maybe some other time, but not tonight. Because, see, it'll be the first time it's just us. In our tent, I mean. So we're looking forward to it... if you know what I mean..."
Then I trailed off and shrugged with as much nonchalance as I could manage. It was the first time I'd almost come out to someone I didn't know too well, but I guessed if Stephan was going to keep doing it, I might as well give it a try myself.
"Oh, " said Dalton, "are you two an item?" then before either of us could answer, he gushed, "That is so cool!"
Really, he practically gushed, but the way he said it, it didn't sound so bad. Normally, I'm not much for gushing. It's a bit stereotypical, if you ask me, but he rushed on with, "But my mom says that at our age, none of us are exactly like... well, you know, like monogamous or whatever, so tomorrow or Tuesday, you guys want to camp out with us at Jaylen and Jayden's? They have a huge back yard and we already have our camp set up, so you want to? It's way cool, you'll see, so you want to, right?"
And so even though we were both familiar with the adage about curiosity killing the cat and we'd also heard of slippery slopes, our prefrontal cortexes simply weren't up to the task of saying no.
Although at least I finally managed to get myself properly fucked that night. Stephan was able to keep going for a long time. He had to put it on pause a couple of times, but he kept trying, and the way I was looking at it, as long as he was inside, I really didn't care. I thought it was fairly awesome, in fact.
And that was a major understatement. It was a very, very...
Well, even if it's a little late for me to start being circumspect, I thought it would be a good idea under the circumstances. And let's see here...
I found it. In Chapter Sixteen, I was saying that I didn't want the entire chapter to be just about sex, but that was mostly because I wanted to avoid being repetitive. It certainly didn't have anything to do with my not enjoying sex. Obviously, we can't be at it constantly... and it's probably just as well, because after awhile, I suppose the novelty could start wearing a little thin...
Only I haven't reached that point yet. Sex is still wonderful. Always. But it's even more wonderful when you're in love and that'swhy we - Stephan and I - were sometimes wondering if it was about to get out of hand.
So now you also know one of the reasons it took me so damn long to finish this chapter. But to summarize... and believe me, it's best that I do... try to summarize... we finally reached the conclusion that we weren't perfect. Not even close! I mean, we'd suspected as much all along, but we were both like kids let loose in a candy store. We'd both wanted to find love, but we were assuming it would probably be awhile and up until then, if the opportunity for sex popped up, we were going for it!
And so we did. Admittedly, though, at first I had more luck than Stephan. Unless you want to count what he did in his fantasies, because in that case...
Okay, I have a confession. Until I read about it in some of those stories, I'd never dreamed of fucking and the first time I read about it, I was quite taken aback. Quite! Because after all, back there was where...
Well, let's be circumspect again. I've adjusted to it, but even so...
Prior to Stephan's escape, he'd only experienced oral sex once and I'd only managed it a few times. But still, we had, so we decided as long as we were open about it, it was perfectly okay to continue going that route every once in awhile with Carlie and Earl. Assuming of course, that they were willing to return the favor. "Favor: Something done or granted out of goodwill, rather than from justice or for remuneration; a kind act."
Exactly. Carlie and Earl were more than willing, and we didn't think it detracted from us being in love with each other. It didn't cheapen it. Society might say otherwise, but then, by and large, society says we can't have sex in the first damn place, so we really don't care what society says...
And it was gloriously wicked. Awesome! And the fact that society wouldn't approve only made it that much better!
Only, then Elliott entered the picture. So we rescued his sorry ass and then we decided he shouldn't be left entirely on the outside looking in, so...
It was even more fun than before and we still felt good about ourselves, but then the Scouts entered the picture and it soon became apparent that we could play a major role in corrupting all of them... even if we soon discovered that some were equally interested in corrupting us.
Sister Mary Katherine would probably take great exception in the form of red ink to my use of clichés in this chapter. I mean, we're overlooking the overall content, because obviously, she'd take very great exception to that, but still, there's "letting the cat out of the bag", curiosity killing the cat", "slippery slope" and "kid in a candy store". I guess since I was quoting, "letting the cat out of the bag" is probably okay, though.
But no matter, I'm about to tack on another. When we decided to head down that goat path, what we didn't know was, we were headed into a perfect storm. Monday, August 3rd. That's when it really and truly started.
Authors deserve your feedback. It's the only payment they get. If you go to the top of the page you will find the author's name. Click that and you can email the author easily.* Please take a few moments, if you liked the story, to say so.
[For those who use webmail, or whose regular email client opens when they want to use webmail instead: Please right click the author's name. A menu will open in which you can copy the email address (it goes directly to your clipboard without having the courtesy of mentioning that to you) to paste into your webmail system (Hotmail, Gmail, Yahoo etc). Each browser is subtly different, each Webmail system is different, or we'd give fuller instructions here. We trust you to know how to use your own system. Note: If the email address pastes or arrives with %40 in the middle, replace that weird set of characters with an @ sign.]
* Some browsers may require a right click instead
